“He does not,” I hissed. “For one, I am not a barely legal twink with more abs than brain cells. Two, there has to be attraction for that and I assure you, I am not attracted to him. At all.”
“Denial isn’t just a river in South America,” Vince said seriously.
“What?” Paul said. “Vince, no. It’s not in South America.”
“Oh. Brazil?”
“That’s still South America.”
“Huh. It’s not Asia, because I would have seen it.”
“Vince, we didn’t go to all of Asia.”
“Mostly,” Vince said. “Remember when you wore that sumo wrestler diaper thing and we had sex next to the shop that sold food that looked like the carcass of a shaved Bigfoot?”
“None of that happened,” Paul said quickly.
“All of that happened.” Vince sounded very smug. “I made you make sex face, like, four times.”
“So gross,” I muttered.
“I can’t believe I’m going to say this,” Corey said, “but I really want to move back to Seafare now.”
“Sorry, baby doll,” I said. “I have my claws in you and I’m never letting you go.”
“But we’ll still give you the illusion of freedom,” Paul said. “Unless you step out of line.”
“Lovely,” Corey said with a sigh.
“Do you forgive me?” I asked Paul.
“For having an incestuous orgy sex dream involving my boyfriend and his brother?”
“Yes.”
“Sure,” Paul said. “Why not. I can dig it.”
“Good,” I said, relieved.
“I love you,” Paul said.
“Aw. I love you too.”
“But I swear to fucking god, Sanford Stewart, if I even catch you looking at my man wrong, I will rip off your fucking arms and shove them so far up your ass, you’ll be gagging on your own fingers.”
The phone beeped as he disconnected the phone call.
“Wow,” Corey said. “Paul can be scary.”
“Sometimes. But usually not at all.” I yawned. “I feel like I can sleep now. Also, we should talk later about getting a hairless cat. I feel like it’s a thing I should have now.”
“Also,” Corey said, “we should talk about that river in South America you seem to be drowning in. I feel like that’s a thing you do now.”
“Turn off the light when you leave,” I said brightly. “And pray you don’t wake up tomorrow with your eyebrows shaved, baby doll. Now go to sleep. You have an early class.”
He grumbled and switched off the light.
I laid back against the pillows and took a deep breath, letting it out slowly.