“Oh. Well, it means his bread is buttered on my—”
“The homosexual thing.”
“Why would you have to get it?” I asked, honestly curious. “I mean, I get that you don’t agree with homosexuality, like it’s some kind of decision. I get that you’re conservative, and that’s your right to be. But something I’ve never understood about the argument against gay rights is how it has any effect on a straight person. Sanctity of marriage? Don’t get gay married. Disgusted by gay sex? Don’t have gay sex. Gay people having children? They’re not your children, so why does it matter? How do gay people with equal rights affect your life in any way, shape, or form?”
“The Bible is pretty clear
on—”
“False,” I said. “The Bible also says women should be treated as an object and that it’s okay to have slaves. So. Unless you agree with that, you don’t get to pick and choose. And what you choose to believe in doesn’t mean you should be able to force that belief on others. Next.”
“Biology dictates—”
“The world is overpopulated as it is. Reproduction isn’t the necessary end goal for unions. What happens when a couple in their seventies want to get married? They can’t reproduce. So how is that couple getting married any different than allowing a gay couple to marry?”
Boom, motherfucker.
“Look,” Taylor said with a sigh. “It’s not as if I don’t see your points. I do. I really do. But the will of the people is what it is. I can’t argue against that.”
“You could,” I pointed out. “You just choose not to to maintain your office. But maybe you could try and show them a different way. People look up to you. You’re in a position of power and blah, blah, blah.”
“Elected position of power,” he reminded me. “Helena, you’re a very sweet girl, but I don’t think you understand how all of this works.”
“Wow,” Darren said. “I don’t think you could have been more condescending if you’d tried. Way to go. And for the record, she’s smarter than both of us combined.”
I tried desperately not to flush at that. I don’t know that I succeeded very well. I couldn’t tell if he was being serious or playing his part. Either way, it shouldn’t have set me off like it did.
“That’s never been my intention,” Taylor said, that politician’s smile coming back out. I thought it might have been charming if I didn’t already know it was tempered by evil. “I simply wanted to enjoy lunch on a nice day with family. Is that so much to ask for?”
“Apparently,” Darren said. “I was talking to you about supporting charities and you asked Helena why she whored me out. So forgive me if I’m not enjoying lunch on a nice day with family.”
“Poor choice of words,” Taylor said. “Obviously, I was misconstrued. Or spoke out of turn, at the very least. Any support the charities can get is obviously a good thing. I only wish it could be under a different set of circumstances. I feel like we could be friends.”
Oh, that motherfucker was good. The right amount of pseudo-sincerity, and just a smidgen of oozing charm and—
Wait a minute.
What was it Mike had said?
Everyone knows Taylor is a betting man. He likes to make wagers. Got him into a lot of trouble years ago….
I was about to make this so much more ridiculous. I wondered if I could somehow parlay this entire experience into my own reality TV show on Bravo. I even already had the title picked out: I’ll See You in Helena. Cheeky, that. Also slightly dirty.
“Care to make it interesting?” I asked, sounding purposefully bored.
“And how’s that?” Taylor asked.
I shrugged and tapped my fingernails on the tabletop. “A friendly wager.”
His smile was all teeth. It would have been more intimidating if I was just sitting here as Sandy Stewart. But I wasn’t. And he didn’t know who he was fucking with. He would soon enough. And by then, it’d be too late.
Notice how I had no fucks left to give.
I said, “I bet you we can raise more money than you can from one of your fundraisers.”
I wished for a moment that we had an audience so they could gasp at my audacity. When I got my TV show, I’d probably have to travel with an entourage wherever I went to make sure I had dramatic gaspers at the ready. Life wasn’t worth living unless you had dramatic gaspers.
“Interesting,” he said. “A fool’s bet, then. I know people with very deep pockets. Are you sure you want to go there, sweetheart?”