“It’s a thing, I guess. Our thing. He didn’t believe me, for whatever reason, when I asked him out the first time. Thought I was playing a joke on him.”
“Well, I can see that,” I say. “I mean, you’re… you. And he’s….” I don’t know exactly what I’m trying to say. It sounds like it was going to a real shitty place. I’m not like that.
But neither is Vince. “He’s what?” he asks, sounding confused.
“He’s what you need, I guess.”
Vince nods. “That’s a good way to put it. I’m just glad he figured out I wasn’t joking.”
“Did it take long?”
“Nah. I wore him down. I can be persuasive when I need to be.”
“Hit you with his car, did he?”
“Flew right over it and everything. Also saved his life from choking on spinach, so his life pretty much belongs to me. It’s in good hands, I think.”
“That’s a Chinese proverb,” I tell him.
He rolls his eyes. “It’s all Asia. The point is that I gave him his life, and he gave me mine in return. And a family that loves me, just the way I am. I don’t need anything else.”
“I’m happy for you, Vince. It sounds great.”
“You going to tell Dom?”
“Tell him what?”
Vince grins. “That you love him. Duh.”
“Shocked” doesn’t even begin to describe me. “Excuse me?”
“Well, you love him, right? He sure loves you. You guys look at each other like Paul and I do. Sandy and Darren say it’s gross, but they do the same thing.” He frowns. “I’m still working on them. I’ll figure it out. Or they will. Or the world will end. I don’t know which will happen first.”
It’d be so easy to bullshit, but I think I might be done with that now. “I don’t know,” I say quietly. “I don’t know how to tell him. I did love him, at one point. I don’t know if it’s the same.”
“Sure seems like it.”
“Does it?”
“Why not just say it?”
“You can’t just say something like that.”
He looks surprised. “Why not? You know, if people actually said what was in their hearts instead of just overthinking everything in their heads, things would be so much easier.”
To which I have no retort. Absolutely none at all. Me. A McKenna. Nothing. “You’re pretty smart, you know that? Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. If they do, you tell them a member of MENSA told you that.”
He beams at me. “Thank you! That’s awesome of you to say. But isn’t MENSA the group of old gross guys who molests little boys? You probably shouldn’t belong to that. I don’t want you to get molested.”
“No… that’s…. Vince, that’s NAMBLA.”
“Oh. Is MENSA Jewish food, then? I don’t know if I’ve ever had Jewish food. I went to Asia and had Asian food, and it wasn’t like Panda Express at all. Everything there had tentacles or used to be a dog, and I felt really bad because I would never cook Wheels. You know? That would just be so wrong and….”
A BRIEF Intermission from the Sages (And From Real Life In General):
I go back inside to find Dom to tell him… I don’t know. Something. Anything. He should have been out there by now.
Do I love him? Fuck if I know.