“That’s not fair. He’s my mate.”
“And Gavin is mine.”
Kelly snorted derisively. “Not yet. He’s feral, Carter. He doesn’t care about you. He doesn’t want you here. He’s told you that over and over, and you just won’t listen.”
My hands curled into fists. My fangs lengthened. “Stop.”
And Kelly said, “I won’t. You need to listen to me. This is stupid. There are others, Carter. Other people who could be your mate. It’s not just Gavin. You know that. You haven’t even thought about being with a man before. You never have. I could smell them, the women you fucked. It would cling to your skin for days, and you didn’t give a shit about who knew. If he was really your mate, you would have known the first time you saw him. I knew with Robbie. Mark did with Gordo. And you saw how Joe was the first time he met Ox.”
My fangs pierced my bottom lip as I ground them together. Blood trickled down on my chin. “You don’t know shit about me, then.”
“He’s using you,” Kelly (Not-Kelly) said. “He used all of us back in Green Creek. We kept him safe. And you know as well as I do that he knew who we were. Who Gordo was. Who Livingstone was. And he did nothing.”
“He saved us.”
“He saved himself,” Kelly growled. “And you fell for it. You left us all behind because you fell for it. You promised me, Carter. You promised it would always be me and you. Why do you hate me so much? What did I ever do to you to make you hurt me like this? Fuck you, Carter. Fuck you for making me think you gave a damn about me.”
“Leave it,” I said in warning. “No more. Kelly, I’m telling you to stop. Now.”
“Or what? What will you do to me? You’re nothing. You’re a shadow of who you used to be. You turned feral once, and I begged you not to. And yet here you are, doing it all over again. Jesus Christ, no wonder you lost Joe.”
The blood drained from my face. “What?” I whispered.
Kelly nodded slowly, and his face was twisted like I’d never seen before. Oh, he was still my brother, the same shape and size and color, but he was darker somehow. Eyes flat and cold, the light snuffed out. “I know, Carter. I wasn’t supposed to, but I know. Joe was with you. Dad told you to keep an eye on him. But you didn’t like your little brother trailing after you, telling you to wait up, Carter. Wait for me! You were with your friends, and you didn’t have time for the little king. You ran, and Joe tried to keep up, but you were too fast. You laughed, your friends laughed, and then Joe was gone. A beast came from the forest and stole our brother away, and you let it happen.”
I moved without thinking. I lunged for him, snarling, claws extended, wanting to tear him, spill his blood, make the truth stop pouring from his mouth. He didn’t flinch. He didn’t try to get away.
No.
He smiled.
And I passed right through him because Kelly wasn’t there at all.
I landed roughly on the ground, skidding through the snow. I came to a stop near an old oak tree, blinking up at the gun-metal sky.
I knew my eyes were flickering violet. That ol’ familiar feeling.
“Help me,” I whispered. “I’m slipping.”
There was no response.
I FOLLOWED HIM deeper into the woods.
There were rabbit tracks. Gavin had stopped near them, and I could see the long divots in the snow where he’d put his snout, chasing the scent.
But he’d let it be and continued on.
I did too.
“Kelly,” I said as I trudged through the forest, “I’m sorry. Come back. Please come back.”
He didn’t.
I wanted to go back to the tree. Find the picture. Hold it against my chest until I felt awake again. It was mine, I knew. All mine. Gavin stole it from me, but I found it. It was mine.
I pushed on.
I walked for what felt like days. Sometimes I thought I saw wolves moving in the trees around me out of the corner of my eye, but anytime I tried to find them, tried to see them straight on, they were gone.