Gordo laughed. “He’s a Bennett. They tend not to think before they act. I’d say it’s part of their charm, but it gets old real fast.”
“I’m sitting right here.”
They ignored me. Gavin said, “It’s not loud. Livingstone. Not like it was.”
“You’re still an Omega,” Robbie said. “He acted like your Alpha, but your eyes are still violet.”
Gavin showed him just how violet they still were. “Won’t hurt people.”
“We know,” Gordo said quickly. “No one thinks you will. If we did, you wouldn’t be in town right now.”
“In basement,” Gavin said. “Like Robbie. Carter. Mark. And the other man.”
“What other man?” I asked.
“The wolf. The one Elijah killed.”
“Pappas,” Gordo said. “Gavin?”
“Questions,” Gavin said. “More questions.”
“More questions,” Gordo echoed. “You remember Pappas?”
“Yes.”
“And all of us.”
“Yes.”
“And everything that happened.”
“Ye-es.” Then, “Sometimes. It’s…. I was wolf. All the time. Different than being human. Simpler. Good wolves. Good humans. Bad wolves. Bad humans. Eat. Shit. Sleep. Run. Carter, Carter, Carter. Thump, thump, thump.” He put his hand on the table, flexing his fingers. The tips of his claws appeared, black and sharp. “Can’t remember everything. But important things.”
That shouldn’t have touched me as much as it did, especially since I was being lumped in with eating and shitting.
“Question,” Gavin said. “I have question.”
“Okay,” Gordo said. “Ask. I’ll answer it if I can.”
Gavin looked up at him. His eyes were clear again, and the lines on his forehead were deep. “Did you know? About me?”
Gordo never looked away from him. “No. I didn’t. If I had….” He shook his head. “I don’t know what I would have done. Especially if I’d found out before everything.” He frowned. “I was angry for a long time. At Mark. Thomas. The Bennetts in general. Wolves. Witches. Magic. I hated it. I hated it all. I was hurting. I’d been left behind, and I had to go it on my own.”
“But you stopped.”
“Stopped what?”
“Hating.”
Gordo sighed. “I did. Look, Gavin. I don’t know what it’s like for you. I can’t even begin to imagine what you’ve been through. But if it’s anything like what happened to me, then I get it. I was toxic. I wasn’t good for anyone. You wouldn’t have liked me back then, and you would have been justified.”
“I don’t like you now,” Gavin said, but it was light, almost conversational.
“Noted,” Gordo said. “And notice how I’m not calling you on your bullshit, even though I should.” He leaned forward, his arm still around Robbie. He put his other arm on the table, his stump smooth and pale. “I had anger in my head and heart. I hated the wolves for all they represented. I hated the Bennetts for abandoning me. I hated witches because of the magic in my veins. I was too young for what they did to me. What Abel Bennett and Livingstone made me do.”
“You’re better now,” Gavin said. He looked down at Gordo’s stump while I was thinking about the scar where the raven had once been. “Mostly.”
“It’s the price I paid. And I would do it again because it meant Ox was safe. That’s the funny thing about hatred and anger. It feeds the fire, but the longer it lasts, the more it burns. And I was tired of burning because I was burning alone.”