“Except for now,” I mumbled.
“Except for now,” he agreed. “And here you are, a destiny of dragons upon your shoulders, the will of the people turning against you, keeping secrets from those you consider dear. A madman nipping at your heels.”
“Succinct summation of the events. My life is terrible.”
“And yet you are alive.”
I squinted at him. “How’s that now?”
He looked up to the heavens as if asking for strength. “Sam, for all intents and purposes, you’re an idiot.”
“Hey!”
“You are reckless and careless, brash and callous. You act without thinking and hope for the best. And most of the time, for reasons only the gods can understand, it has worked. But now, when you should be as surefooted as you’ve ever been, you’re stumbling. Because you’ve decided to overthink things. Stop thinking, Sam. It doesn’t suit you.”
“I can’t tell if you’re complimenting me or destroying me.”
“Both,” Justin said promptly. “But maybe more the former than the latter. I am envious of you. Because of your abilities. Not the magic. I couldn’t care less about magic. But how you are, how you live your life. That, Sam, is enviable. And when I see you as you are now, suspicious and hiding things… it’s concerning.”
Well, if I hadn’t felt like an asshole before, I sure did now. “Wow,” I said. “I don’t know if I’ve ever been more emotionally manipulated in my life. Good on you.”
“You’re being deliberately difficult.”
“A little bit. But I’m trying to save Verania, and it sounds like you’re telling me to jump without looking.”
“You’ve somehow tricked your way into gathering four dragons at your side,” Justin said wryly. “Taking a leap is essentially all you do. Nothing is happening between Ryan and me. Somehow he has become my friend… as you have, as distasteful as that is to admit out loud.”
I grinned at him.
He groaned. “Stop looking at me like that.”
I laid my head on his shoulder. “I love you too,” I whispered.
He muttered death threats against my person but didn’t push me away.
The fire snapped in front of us, and for a time, neither of us spoke.
“You can do this, Sam,” he said finally. “You just need to trust in those around you. I know you think you have to protect everyone, but we all need to protect you too. And that is something you must allow us to do. You’re angry. I don’t blame you for that. But I choose to believe Morgan and Randall did what they did out of love for you. They tried to shield you for as long as they could, much like you did to us. To Ryan. It’s the same, in the end.”
We stayed by the fire late into the night, listening as Gary and Kevin began round three. It sounded as if they were role-playing spies again.
It was terrible.
RYAN WAS awake when I went back to the bedroll.
He held up an arm so that I could curl up against him.
“How much of that did you hear?” I asked.
His voice was rough with sleep when he spoke. “Enough to know that Justin was right. You’re an idiot.”
“Yeah, yeah.”
“When we get back to Castle Lockes, you and I are going to have a long talk about being hypocritical.”
“Any chance we can skip that and go straight to the butt sex?”
“Not even the smallest of chances.”