Ryan scowled.
Ruv looked amused. “I see we are well met. She will be pleased by all of you, as I am. The phuro will enter.”
He turned on his heel and walked back through the Great Doors.
Chapter 5: Vadoma Tshilaba
“OKAY,” GARY said as soon as he disappeared. “I feel like we should have real talk right now. Because seriously? Dat. Ass. Do you know how many coins you could bounce off of that thing?”
“I have many coins in my horde,” Kevin said. “Perhaps we should invite him to see.”
“I don’t like him,” Ryan said. “He’s suspicious. Coming in here all… suspiciously.”
Justin snorted. “Yeah, because that’s the reason.”
“What?” Ryan asked, eyes narrowed. “There’s no other reason. I don’t need another reason. There was suspiciousness. That should be enough reason for everyone!”
“Uh-huh,” Justin said, sounding bored. “And it had absolutely nothing to do with how he was like a starving man and Sam was a four-course meal. Which, honestly. What is with people and their incredibly bad taste in this kingdom? I know attraction is subjective, but come on.”
“Hey!”
“You have a strange eyebrow-to-face ratio,” Justin said with a shrug.
“Feeling self-conscious now,” I said, covering my eyebrows with my hand and glaring at Gary. “You should have told me I had weirdness going on!”
Gary blinked. “I thought it was just something we didn’t talk about. You know, like how we don’t talk about your nose.”
“What’s wrong with my nose?”
“Eep,” Gary said.
“There’s nothing wrong with your nose,” Ryan said, pulling my hand away from my face. “And I like your bushy eyebrows.”
I gaped at him. “They’re not bushy.”
“Like my taint before I get waxed,” Gary said, which I ignored because oh my fucking gods, I could never go out in public again.
“He doesn’t want to sex me up,” I said to Ryan. “And even if he did, you know you’re my one and only. You remember when we shattered my virginity? Well, I latched on to you like a barnacle after that. I’m slowly sucking the life out of you, because I’m never going to let you go.”
“Do you ever get the feeling like we failed as parents?” Dad asked Mom.
“Either that or we did something really right,” Mom said. “I don’t know which is worse.”
“I don’t trust this,” the King said to Morgan. “He did seem to have eyes for Sam.”
Morgan hesitated. Then, “Sam’s… notoriety is well-known throughout Verania. We don’t rightly know what has fallen upon gypsy ears.”
“I’m taking that as a good thing,” I told Gary. “They call me Notorious S.A.M.”
“Nobody calls you that.”
“Well maybe they should start.”
“Look at you with your head in the sand,” Gary said. “Nice.”
“We should hear what she has to say,” Mom said. “She never does anything without reason. The fact that she left the desert is enough to raise concern.”
The King nodded but said nothing.