A Destiny of Dragons (Tales From Verania 2)

“Oh my gods,” Gary whispered. “This shit is gonna get cray-cray. Tonight, on Castle Lockes, watch as families reunite as a crazy old lady with awesome taste in jewelry sees her daughter again for the first time. Will eyes be scratched out? Find out… on Castle Lockes.”

“Bah,” Vadoma said, seemingly dropping all pretense. She slouched a little, her forehead wrinkling even more. “My heart will stop when it needs to stop, little kanny.”

“I am not your little chicken,” Mom snapped, dropping my father’s hand and pushing her shoulders back.

“I made you,” Vadoma said. “You took forty-seven hours to come out of me because I wasn’t ready to let you go yet. You are little kanny until I say so.”

“I want to be her when I grow up,” Gary said to Tiggy. “Forty-seven hours? My gods, the thigh control alone.”

“Gary gonna have babies?” Tiggy asked.

“Probably,” Gary said. “But most likely not.”

“I be Uncle Tiggy,” the half-giant decided.

Vadoma turned her disdainful gaze to my father. “Still here, I see. Dilo. You got fat. You like processed meats, fat man? Probably put them in your fat mouth.”

Dad sighed. “Hi, Vadoma. Lovely to see you again, Vadoma. Thanks for coming, Vadoma.”

“Your parents ate sass for breakfast,” Gary said.

I was still gaping. Because out of all the things that I thought could happen, this was certainly not it.

“You come to posta, fat man,” Vadoma said with a nod. “I feed you good food.”

My dad snorted. “It hasn’t been long enough for me to forget the first time you invited me to a posta. You forgot to tell me that it was a sacrificial ritual and that I was to be the sacrifice.”

“Spoils surprise,” Vadoma said. “Very bad. Vadoma doesn’t like spoiling surprises.”

“Crazy lady sacrifice Josh-pop?” Tiggy asked Gary.

“It seems like,” Gary said, sounding impressed. “And she can pull off a shoulderless dress at her age? Sign me up for that shit right the fuck now. Gypsy queen who can sacrifice people when she wants to? That’s what I was born for.”

“I smash crazy lady?” Tiggy asked.

“If you do, make sure you don’t get blood on the clothes. You know how hard it is for me to find good vintage these days. Also, we’ll want to ensure that I’m installed somehow as the new figurehead. Queen Gary the Magnificent. No. Queen Gary the Supreme Magnificent.”

“I smash crazy lady,” Tiggy said, taking a step forward.

“I don’t know if that’s the best course of action,” Morgan said mildly.

Tiggy pouted. I could see Morgan struggling against that look to give the go-ahead to smash my grandmother. Greater men than anyone in this room had fallen to the power of Tiggy’s pout. But somehow, Morgan was able to withstand it.

The King stood from his throne and bowed toward Vadoma. “It is an honor.”

Vadoma said, “Of course it is. I am here, am I not?”

He didn’t even blink at that. “So you are. Though I must admit to being a bit mystified as to the reason for this visit.”

“You would be,” Vadoma said.

“How many of your people am I to be expecting in the City of Lockes?”

She snorted. “Just me and the boy.”

The King frowned. “I didn’t expect the phuro to travel without an entourage.”

She ignored his unspoken question. “Is that your son?”