Not knowing what to say to such a terrible desire, Kitty peered a little closer and saw that she was biting her lip, clearly trying not to cry. Then Araminta burst out, “Promise me you’ll not blackmail me! I truly thought you knew…had discovered the truth that night…and that it was you who’d sent the blackmail note.”
“But you asked me to come with you.”
“I’d thought to expose you. I expected no one would come at midnight, and then suddenly you’d announce that you knew everything.”
“And then what were you going to do? Hit me over the head?”
Araminta let out an amused snort. “I hadn’t thought that far. Actually I was going to propose that if I saw to you achieving your heart’s desire, or something within my means to grant you, that you’d withdraw your threats to expose the truth about…you know.”
“Well, it’s beyond your power to grant me my heart’s desire, since all I really want to do is marry Lord Silverton who is due to wed Miss Mandelton in a few weeks. And I want to see Lissa happy and able to marry Ralph. Those are the two things I want more than anything, but even though you’re not in a position to grant those, I’m certainly not about to unmask you. I should warn you about Mrs. Montgomery, though. She seemed quite cowed when she left, but she’s pure evil. I wouldn’t trust her at all.”
Kitty was sti
ll thinking about the child and that she should question Araminta more, but then the carriage came to an abrupt halt, and the jarvey called out that they were at their destination.
“Good night, Miss Bijou. You shall have to walk from here, I’m afraid. I do acknowledge that I owe you a debt of service, though.” Araminta appeared distracted as she glanced up at the window of her townhouse. A light shone in a window of the second floor.
“Are you afraid?” Kitty had always been impulsive and knew she had no right to ask such a question.
Araminta looked at her for a long time, and a play of emotions crossed her face in the gaslit gloom. Then she laughed as she gripped the door frame. “I’m married to Lord Debenham. What could I possibly be afraid of? And now he’s taking me to Lady Richmond’s ball, where I shall dance the night away with not a care in the world, and people will whisper and wonder if I really am happy with a man who has such a sinister reputation, but then they will say, ‘Well, lucky for Lady Debenham she produced an heir for her husband in a timely nine months. At least, she has done her duty’.” She leaned forward, gathering her cloak around her and preparing to quit the carriage as the jarvey stood with the door open, adding in a whisper, “And the fact I’ve done my duty is the only thing that keeps me safe from my husband’s erratic temper.”
Chapter 19
Another London entertainment. It was strange how weary not dancing made Lissa feel. No one ever danced with the governess, and although Lissa would strenuously deny wanting to, the truth was that each time she accompanied Lucinda and Lady Julia to such events, she was ever more consumed by the idea that this was a world from which she was forever barred, and yet it was…Ralph’s world.
“The girl is looking in fine form. Let us hope she behaves herself.” Lissa glanced up at Lady Julia, who muttered this as she wafted past in crimson chiffon leaving the lingering scent of bergamot behind her; a musky, sultry scent that matched the look in her eye which she directed toward Lord Beecham whose side she now joined.
Lissa wondered what had happened that the pair had mended relations, since Lady Julia had returned recently from a few days visiting her husband at their country house. Certainly, she appeared to be in high spirits, the almost lighthearted atmosphere in the Beecham household a contrast to the heavy, recriminatory cloud that had lain so heavily upon the occupants before she’d gone away for her short sojourn.
Lissa nodded. Indeed, it seemed an answer from her wasn’t required as Lady Julia was now occupied with far more interesting company. And indeed, wasn’t that the way it was with Lissa. She was below anyone’s notice—the drab, dowdily-dressed governess, whose duty was to keep an eye on her wayward charge while her own life slipped by.
“My Lord but you’re a sight for sore eyes.”
Self-contained she might be, but Lissa was unable to stop her gasp as she glanced up into the face of her own true love. Ralph smiled down at her, the familiar crease lines about his eyes making her want to trace them lovingly. Instead, she shook her head as he begged, “Stand up with me for this one?”
“You know I can’t,” she whispered, fearful their exchange might be noticed by anyone who mattered. “We’re not supposed to know one another, Ralph.” She lowered her eyes to the worn hem of her skirts beneath which even more worn slippers peeped. Only a few inches away were Ralph’s well-polished shoes, and above that his finely-cut evening trousers. She slid her eyes upward again, thinking what a fine figure he cut and wondering how he dared—or even wanted to—court the unlovely governess she was.
“We’re going to know one another all too well before the year is out, Miss Hazlett. I’m going to marry you,” he vowed, bowing. “And soon! This waiting is killing me.”
“Oh Ralph, it’s killing me, too. And here I am, doing absolutely nothing that’s making any difference at all when I simply want to throw myself into…doing something. Anything other than biding my time.”
“You’ve already had one close call, my dearest. Stay safe, that’s all I ask.”
Lissa sent him a rueful smile. “I think I shall die of staying safe if such a thing is possible. Have no fear, Ralph. There is not the slightest bit of danger that threatens me. I just worry for you.”
She glanced across the room to where Lord Debenham was, surprisingly, in the company of his wife. The pair had arrived shortly before, Araminta looking regal in a gown of gold net over a cream underslip. “Go, Ralph, before he sees you talking to me. Oh dear, Miss Lucinda is looking at us. I hope she doesn’t ask questions.”
She lowered her head, repelled by another sight of her worn dancing slippers, and wondering how she’d have felt had she donned the beautiful pale green confection Kitty had had delivered to her this evening. She’d been sorely tempted, at the same time as knowing it was totally impossible to appear dressed in public in the first stare. Think of the questions she’d be subjected to by Lady Julia and Miss Lucinda. Not to mention the suspicion Lord Beecham would harbor.
“Now there’s a handsome couple.” Lady Julia was back at Lissa’s side, pointing now toward the dance floor. Lissa squinted and felt a curious emotion at the sight of Ralph partnering Lucinda in a quadrille. “The girl looks positively thrilled. Of course, she is not properly out, so I hope she doesn’t set her sights on a sixth son when she could do better. Not much, mind you.” She looked thoughtful. “Perhaps there’s a match in it, after all. He has the name; she has the fortune.”
“It’s a first dance!” Lissa said with far too much energy, for Lady Julia blinked in surprise before, to her relief, dropping the subject.
“Of course it is, and I’m getting carried away. Goodness but I hope we get that girl fired off before I have to endure a second season.”
Lissa was still feeling unaccountably distressed as Lady Julia drifted away. So much so that when she saw Ralph disappear into the passage, she incautiously rose and followed him after whispering to Lucinda that she needed to attend to nature’s call.
He turned when he was halfway down the passage having sensed her presence, his delight transparent as he came toward her. “My dear girl!” He broke off, masking his feelings as a gentleman entered the corridor, but as soon as he’d passed, Ralph furtively gripped Lissa’s fingertips and gave them a squeeze before dropping them.