Every Time We Kiss
Page 48
“I can’t make you keep secrets from Banning.”
“Jennette, you were my friend long before I married your brother. I will always keep your secrets safe.”
Jennette closed her eyes. “I can’t stop thinking about him.”
“Thinking about him in what manner?”
Jennette blinked and stared at her friend. “How do you think?”
“Oh my,” Avis whispered. “I have been in that situation. It’s most frustrating.”
“But you did something about it. I most certainly cannot take him as my lover.”
Avis paced the pathway with her finger over her lips. “No, I don’t suppose you can. However, you could take another man—”
“Avis! I could never do such a thing.”
“No?” she replied coyly. “That is very telling, Jennette. If Blackburn killed John accidentally, what is stopping you from being with him?”
Jennette stared down at her jonquil morning dress. She longed to tell Avis the truth. Finally free herself of this overwhelming burden. But she couldn’t. The truth was far too ugly.
There had to be a good reason she couldn’t take him as a lover, other than the obvious, that it was against her upraising.
“I am leaving for Florence in a few weeks. It would be dreadfully wrong to make such a decision knowing I will be gone soon.”
Avis chuckled. “Indeed. Seems like the perfect time as long as you don’t wish to marry him.”
“You don’t believe me, do you?”
“No. I think you want him no matter what your past history and no other man will do. If you don’t do this, you will wonder for the rest of your life what it would have been like.”
Jennette shook her head. “I can’t believe you, Avis. You had the same virtuous upbringing I did and yet you stand before me all but daring me to have an affair with a man who killed my betrothed.”
“Sophie told you he was coming back into your life. There has to be a better reason than simply he wanted your help in finding a bride.”
“Sophie foresaw his coming,” Jennette replied. “That is all. She never said we would fall in love or become lovers or anything to do with love. Only that he was returning to my life.”
Avis laughed again. “Trust me, Sophie only tells people what she thinks they can handle at the time.”
Jennette stood and walked over to the small lime trees. She stroked a green leaf and whispered, “He’s kissed me twice.”
Avis halted by the row of orange trees. “And?”
“It was amazing. Like no kiss I’ve ever had before in my life. I didn’t want it to end.”
“I think you had better decide quickly if you plan to seduce him.”
There was nothing to think about regarding that idea. She knew she could never be with Matthew that way. Mary would be the perfect wife for him, Jennette couldn’t. She had promised her father she would never marry a gambler or fortune hunter, and Matthew was both. Mary would warm his bed every night. Jennette’s heart suddenly felt like someone stuck a knife into it.
“I will never be with him that way, Avis.”
Miss Marston wrapped her arm with Matthew’s as they walked through the dying garden. The wind whipped around them, chilling him and most likely her as well. They should have stayed inside by the fire and played cards.
“Tell me about your estates,” she said, tying her bonnet a little tighter. She glanced back and smiled at her maid who’d accompanied them.
“I have only two, plus the house in town.”
“Are they large?”