Something Scandalous

“I don’t know for certain, but what I read was not good. It was more than disturbing.”

“Oh, God,” she said, covering her face with her hands.

He drew her into his arms. “You don’t have to face this right now.”

“Yes, I do. I have to know. For years I have gone to balls and stared at all the gentlemen, wondering if one of them could be my father.” She wiped away the tears streaming down her cheeks. “I have to know.”

“All right. Do you want me to leave you alone?” The last thing he wanted to do was let her read these disgusting journals alone. But he also hated the idea that she would be embarrassed reading them with him.

Elizabeth stared at Will, and then at the books on her lap. He had already read some of her father’s journal. He already knew some of what happened. And she didn’t think she could handle reading the rest alone.

“No,” she whispered. “Please stay with me.”

He pulled her closer and kissed her softly. “I shall be right here for you. Nothing we read will ever cross my lips to another.”

“Thank you.”

She sat next to him with her head on his shoulder and opened her mother’s diary first. As she did, she prayed she would find some admission that the duke had somehow forced her into his depraved ways. But reading the entries from the month of January made her realize that her own mother was just as dissolute as the duke.

January’s entries discussed the affair she was having with a man referred to only as Lord M. By the end of the month, it appeared Lord M had broken off the affair.

Elizabeth’s hands shook as she turned the page into February. Would she discover another man had taken Lord M’s place? Her mother and the duke had attended a party at a nearby estate. Her mother’s entry related the entertainment of the night, watching a seventeen-year-old virgin being deflowered by the lord of the manor. And then all the other men had their chance with the girl, as well as with the other women in the room.

“Oh, God,” she cried. How could the woman she thought of as kind have been such an awful person?

“Maybe you should skip ahead to June and July,” Will said.

She nodded, knowing she could not bear another minute of this wicked book. No wonder it had been so well hidden. She flipped the pages until she came to the entry for July 10.

John and I have finally found a way to break the boredom of this party. A wager! Whoever can bed the first servant shall win one hundred pounds. I have no doubt that I shall be victorious, and I know exactly what I will do with the money.

This should be rather easy. I have had my eye on the young red-haired footman since we arrived. Now I just have to entice him.

“Now they are wagering over servants!” Elizabeth shook her head in disgust.

“Red-haired footman,” Will mumbled. “This only gets worse.”

“How so?” Elizabeth had no idea how this could get any worse. The journal was nothing but wicked entries about who she had sexual congress with, and when.

He picked up the duke’s journal and started turning pages while she continued reading. It wasn’t until the entry for four days later that she gasped.

“What?” he asked.

“She won the wager.”

“I know.”

She glanced back at him with a frown. “How could you possibly have known?”

He blew out a breath and handed her the duke’s journal, opened to the page he’d read yesterday. “When I read this I had never heard your mother being called Camille before. I assumed the woman he referred to was his mistress.”

Elizabeth started to read the entry from the duke’s journal. “He watched! How depraved were they?”

“Keep reading.”

Elizabeth read the entry twice. “No, it’s not possible. A footman! My father was a footman!”

She threw the book across the room with all her might. For years, she had imagined who her father might be, but never had she thought her mother would have bedded a servant. Elizabeth stared at the book on her lap. She wanted to burn them both and scorch the images from her head.