She cocked her head. “Hate or are you scared of them?”
He closed his eyes and remembered what led to his fear. He’d never told a soul about this. “Terrified of the filthy creatures.”
“Why?” Her thumb gently stroked his cheekbone.
“When I was nine, my brother Simon and I were at the estate in the Cotswolds. We were exploring the old dowager house that had fallen into disrepair. As I walked across the room, the floorboards gave out and I fell into the dirt cellar. It was pitch-black and I couldn’t find the stairs.”
“And there were rats in the cellar?” she asked.
He nodded. “Simon couldn’t find anything to help me out. The part of the building where the stairs were had collapsed so he couldn’t get to them. He told me he would run back to the estate to get help.”
“How long did it take him?”
Nicholas squeezed his eyes tighter as the pain returned. “It wasn’t Simon who prolonged my stay in that dank place.”
“Then who?”
“My father,” he muttered, disgusted again with how his father had treated him as a child.
“What?”
“When my father heard that we had disobeyed him, he wanted me to face my penance in that cellar. It took them five hours to return for me. As I sat there, I could hear the rats scuttling across the floor and squeaking.”
“But you might have been seriously hurt!”
“I know, but thankfully I wasn’t. I only had a few scratches from the fall. Still, the sound of those disgusting creatures scared me to death.”
She kissed him softly. “You do realize that they were probably only field mice.”
“I know that now. But when you’re nine and stuck in a dark place with only rodents for company . . .”
She cupped his cheeks and kissed him again. “Shh, I cannot imagine what that must have been like. And I hate your father for putting you through it.”
“So do I,” he murmured before moving his lips to hers. As much as he enjoyed talking with her, desire flared again with a simple kiss.
She pulled back slightly. “You should leave now,” she said breathlessly.
He curled his hand around her neck and brought her closer to him. “You really don’t want me to leave yet.”
“Are you reading my mind now?” she said before kissing him deeply.
Chapter 17
Sophie woke slowly, blinking as she gingerly lifted her head off Nicholas’s chest. She looked down at his sleeping face for several moments. What would it be like to wake every morning next to him? Would they lie together and confess to more secrets about themselves? Would they tire of each other after a few years?
Her lips lifted into a smile. The idea of becoming bored with Nicholas seemed impossible. Her heart told her to forget her intuition and admit her condition to him. He would love their child and hopefully come to love her as well. But something stopped her.
Marrying her would cause untold problems for him. His father would never consent to her becoming the next duchess. The only possible chance of gaining his permission would be to tell him the identity of her father. And that would cause countless issues for her and her family. None of it mattered anyway. His father had threatened to disinherit Nicholas for marrying an unacceptable woman.
If she told him about the baby, nothing would stop him from marrying her. Even if it was the worst thing for him and his family. How could she do that to him?
A wave of queasiness washed over her. She laid her head back down on the pillow and blew out a few deep breaths. Praying she wouldn’t disturb him, she opened her nightstand and pulled out a biscuit she’d hidden there. She chewed the biscuit quickly and then reclined her head on the pillow again.
She stared up at the white ceiling and wondered how her life had become so complicated. While she had apologized to Nicholas for her dreadful assumption regarding Jennette, Sophie would have to speak with Jennette, too. She doubted her hardheaded friend would forgive her so easily.
Warm lips kissed her bare shoulder. She closed her eyes and smiled as delicious shivers raced through her body. Perhaps he was the secret to relieving her upset stomach.
He rolled on his side and looked down at her. He brushed a crumb off the corner of her mouth with a smile. “Eating in bed?”