“Don’t!” I spat. I held my hand out. I was on fire. Anger flooding my veins, searing my body. “So Katherine was telling the truth. Wow. And I refused to believe her because I couldn’t think you all were petty and stupid enough to go through with something like this.” I laughed once. “Guess I was wrong about that. You are that stupid.”
“Natalie…”
I glared at him with the fire of a thousand suns. “Just so we’re clear, Penn didn’t lose. I’m right here. And I clearly cared for him enough to abandon my flight home and call a cab to tell him how I felt. Like an idiot.”
Penn’s face contorted in pain. But I had no sympathy for him. He’d done this to himself.
“So, there. Bet over. And you can all go fuck yourselves.”
I whirled on my feet and stormed back out of the library.
Penn raced out of the library behind me. I could hear his footsteps as he caught up with me. I was making a scene as I rushed through the house. I didn’t even care that people were staring at us. Or that the mayor had just appeared, looking aghast. I didn’t care about any of it. Just that I’d actually done this incredibly stupid thing. And it had all backfired in my face.
“Natalie!” he called as we stormed through the living room.
“Leave. Me. Alone!”
I shoved some socialite out of my way and yanked the door open. I tried to slam it in Penn’s face, but he grabbed the door and hurried out after me.
“Natalie, please, let me explain.”
He tugged on my arm to get me to stop. I turned around so fast and slapped him hard across the face. The sound rang out into the silence. His stunned look was enough for me.
I yanked my arm away from him. “Don’t touch me. Don’t ever touch me again.”
“I deserved that.” His eyes were wide and pleading. Full of that devotion I’d enjoyed as a lie for two months.
I hated him in that moment. Hated him for that look. And how it made me weak in the knees.
“Yes, you did.”
“Please, let me explain.”
I glared at him. “Explain what exactly? That you played me? Again? A-fucking-gain, Penn?” I nearly shrieked at him. “That this is all a lie? Some fucking game to you. My life is not a game! I’m a human being. You don’t get to toy with me like a puppeteer, tugging on my strings.”
“I wasn’t. I swear. It wasn’t like that with you.”
“You entered a bet! You actually bet on whether or not you could fuck me and get me to fall for you. That is playing with people’s lives! My life. And what did I get out of it? A few weeks of sex and then a lost job, a lost place to stay, a lost life.”
“I did not expect any of that to happen.”
“You never expect it! Because nothing bad ever happens to you. And none of you give a fuck that you’re ruining other people’s lives! That girl Addie even tried to warn me,” I said with a shake of my head. Disgusted with myself. “And I was too dumb, too stuck up your ass to see it.”
“Natalie, I am so sorry for what happened. But I’m glad that we had those months. I didn’t know that we’d fall for each other. That we’d end up here.”
“Do you even hear yourself?” I shook my head in exasperation. Then I turned and started walking down the driveway.
“Natalie, stop.”
“No, you stop! Stop talking to me! I don’t want to hear anything else that comes out of that mouth of yours. You can’t make this right. In Paris, you lied and manipulated me. That is nothing compared to this. Fool me once.”
“It was all real. The bet was stupid. Just a pretense for me to get close to you. But how I feel, that’s real,” he tried to assure me.
“You didn’t need a pretense!” I screamed at him.
I stopped in place, looked up at the sky, the beautiful blue sky that was such a lie today when everything else fell apart. I couldn’t stand this. Couldn’t handle this anymore.
I turned to face him. Not with tears in my eyes, but anger. No heartbreak, just emptiness. This was the end. It was over. Penn Kensington had done everything he could to ruin what was left of the romantic in my soul.
My voice was calm when I finally spoke again, “You spew all this shit about ethics. But you can’t tell that betting on someone’s life is wrong? That this is wrong? You research and study and teach what is happiness, what is the good life, how to live an ethical existence. But you don’t live it.”
“Nat…”
“You’re not ethical, Penn. You’re a hypocrite. A fraud.” I swallowed back the pain welling in my chest. “You think you’re so above everyone else on the Upper East Side, but really, you’re just a wolf in sheep’s clothing. Pretending to be one of the good guys when you’re no different than any of them.”