I laugh. “You know I will.”
“Good. Since I became a public figure, most people blow smoke up my ass. I don’t like it. You and Bella keep things real and keep me grounded.”
“Maybe a little smoke is a good thing considering how exceptional you are at self-hate.” I press my hand to his face. “We’re going to work on that. Maybe one day you’ll love you as much as I do.”
He captures my hand, his energy sudden sharper, darker. “Or maybe one day you’ll learn to hate me, too, Allie.”
In other words, the things he didn’t tell me about the night his brother died are the parts that hurt the most. They’re also the parts he feels I can’t handle, because he can’t handle them, But I don’t tell him any of these things, I don’t push him to tell what he’s not ready to tell. I simply say, “Never.”
My cellphone rings where it rests on the counter, and when I would ignore it, Dash glances at the caller ID and says, “Your mother. I’m guessing she read my interview.” He kisses my hand. “Talk to her, cupcake.” He stands and walks to the coffee pot, filling his cup and warming mine.
I answer the line with, “Morning, Mother.”
“Oh my God. I read the interview with Dash.” I glance at Dash and nod, letting him know he nailed it on the reason for her call. “He practically said he wanted to marry you.”
I’d expected her to worry about his fighting, but no, she went straight to a place I haven’t dared. And now there are butterflies in my belly. “No,” I say. “He did not.” And when I feel Dash’s eyes on me, I quickly try to frame the conversation. “He tried to keep it all hush-hush, but he gets too much attention not to have rumors start he didn’t need right now.”
“You’re ignoring the marriage thing.”
“That plot point doesn’t spoil anything,” I say talking about the book, and where the fighting comes into play, rather than a wedding ring.
“He’s right there,” she assumes. “Of course, he’s right there, you live with him. He loves you.”
“That’s true,” I confirm.
“And you love him.”
“Yes, Mom,” I say, and then change the topic, moving away from the awkwardness of this conversation being had in front of Dash. “You spoke with Mrs. Compton?”
“You mean Dana,” she says. “Yes. She’s a lovely person. And I understand everything she feels. I’m so thankful you connected us. I think we’re going to be friends for life and we’ve only just met each other.”
“How is she?”
“She’s weathering the storm. Right now, her doctors are happy with her progress, but her case was worse than mine. I’m praying our lifetime of friendship is a long one. I’m hopeful that it will be.”
My mother and Queen Compton come from two different worlds, one from money and power, while my mother has lived a humble life, and yet, I see them both as nurturing in their own ways. “I pray so, too, Mom. She’s been really inspiring to me. She was also there at a bad time in my life.”
“When you broke up with Brandon.”
“Yes.” Guilt stabs at me. “Mom, I never told you—”
“That he was your father’s agent?”
My eyes go wide. “You knew?”
“Of course, I knew. Your father couldn’t wait to call and gloat about you being there in New York with him.”
“Mom—”
“It’s okay, honey. I knew you’d want to know him at some point. I didn’t keep him away from you. And I’m sorry he disappointed you.”
“How did you know that?”
“Because I know him. No other way. I promise.”
“I’ll tell you the story, but not over the holiday.”
“No. Not over the holiday. Let’s embrace our new family with Dash and Bella. And if you don’t get a ring for Christmas, I’ll be as shocked as I would have been if your father was a changed man. Love you, honey. Come to Sunday brunch soon.” She groans before I can answer and says, “Your stepfather is calling me. He lost his glasses. They’re probably on his head.”
We laugh and say our goodbyes.
Dash sits back down beside me and sips from his cup as I do the same. “That sounded like an interesting conversation.”
“She knew I’d connected with my father.”
“How?”
I set my cup down and rotate to face him more fully. “He told her. God, I feel bad, Dash. Like I betrayed her.”
“From what I know of your mother, I think she’s pretty forgiving. When did your father call her?”
“Back when I first connected with him. I had no idea.”
“And was she angry?”
“No. She said she expected me to connect with him at some point in my life. But that doesn’t mean she wasn’t hurt when it was happening.”
“There’s an old saying. If you love someone, set them free. If they don’t come back, they were never yours. That’s not exact, but you get the idea. You came back to her. She knows you love her.”