Chapter 8
Matthew
I don’t want to live anymore.
I thought life was bleak and colorless before she came into the picture, but every minute without her now that I’ve breathed her air is unacceptable.
A trial.
I haven’t been able to leave this office since she walked out of it, because I don’t want to look at the outside world. Don’t want to face it without her. Kaylee gave me a reason to live, she stole the loneliness and now that her life-affirming presence is gone, I’m depleted. I’m raw and miserable and I deserve every second of it.
The hurt I caused her.
She wasn’t going to betray me. If I’d listened to my heart earlier, I would have known.
She was so brave and incredible, standing up to her father, and what reward did I have to offer? A video of me defiling her. In the place she holds sacred, nonetheless. I’m a monster.
I stare bleary-eyed at the computer screen, the words and numbers in a senseless jumble. It’s the middle of the night. She left me three days ago and I’ve been working on this project ever since. I meant what I said—I won’t live without her. But I’m going to leave this world a better man than she found me. So I’ve spent the last three days signing over assets to the people I’ve wronged. I’m doing it in Kaylee Hale’s name. I’m taking apart my empire, because none of it matters anymore.
I’ve been to heaven in her arms.
Now I’ll send myself to hell. It’s as simple as that. It’s where I was always heading.
In an ironic twist, the anger inside of me is gone. I’ve been holding on to it for so long, this self-directed rage. I started Borden to get revenge in its purest form. Somewhere along the line, I lost myself and simply became corrupt like the people I swore to bring down. Corrupt like my parents, too. It’s all a cycle and I’d let myself become a part of it.
But with this final act, I’m separating myself from the festering dishonesty.
I’m making myself worthy of her, even if she doesn’t want me anymore.
Even if maybe it’s too late to be good, like she deserves.
I make sure all of the pertinent documents are attached to the email to my attorney, then I hit send. And I stand up on legs made of vapor, beginning a slow climb to the roof, whispering her name over and over again as I go.
Kaylee
I wake up to the world exploding.
There is someone banging on my door.
My phone is ringing off the hook. It’s my father.
I haven’t gotten out of bed for three days, except to use the bathroom. My heart rattles inside of me like puzzle pieces in a box, my temples pound and a layer of dread cloys me at all times. Squeezing me until I feel nothing but lifeless. Even though I knew my bond with Matthew was vital and gigantic, I underestimated what it would be like living without him. It’s torture. I can’t keep food down and I’ve run out of tears. I’m sick enough to be admitted to a hospital if I could bear to leave the darkness of my bedroom.
And now someone has come to shatter my hideous solitude.
It takes me long minutes to get out of bed and walk downstairs to the door. My robe hangs off my body and I can barely see straight, but I open the door and find a man in a suit staring back at me.
“Kaylee Hale,” he says in a rush. “I need you to come with me.”
“What?”
My voice sounds like it’s coming from a great distance away.
All at once, he seems to notice that I’m barely clinging to life.
“Jesus, are you all right?”
“Who are you?” I whisper, because it hurts to talk. The sunlight in my eyes is an assault.
“I’m Randall Hobbs, CFO at Borden Enterprises.”
Borden Enterprises. Everything comes into sharp focus. Absently, I remember my father was calling me upstairs. I can’t hold on to a single thought. “What are you doing here?”
“Matthew…” He shakes his head, visibly shaken. “I don’t know what to do.”
I don’t think I can sink any lower into the mire. Until his grim tone of voice registers. Until now when the ground seems to rise up and threaten to swallow me. “Where is he? What’s going on?”
He uses the doorjamb for support. “He was seconds from jumping off the roof of Borden Enterprises last night, but he was thwarted by security. It took five men to keep him from leaping and…he’s been brought to a mental health facility uptown.”
Black is bleeding in from the edges of my vision and I’m growing dizzy.
I’m wracked with shivers, stomach pitching wildly.
No. No, no, no. No.
The man is still talking, his words like swords driving into my ears.
“He’d been locked in his office for three days. I assumed he was working on a deal, but…no. He was offloading company stock and transferring titles of some of our biggest real-estate holdings. Half of his fortune is gone. He’s unhinged…”