Her chest hurt from holding her breath, but she was relieved her voice sounded relatively normal, at least to her own ears. “Goodbye.”
“Sweetie, wait—” Mel called, but she was already out the door.
No stopping now. If she stopped, she might run back into that suite and force Murphy to confront his feelings for her. Feelings her feminine intuition told her he had, but he didn’t want to acknowledge. He was a man who was emotionally unavailable to her and she refused to get herself back into another situation like that again. She’d been through it with Daveed. No more.
She walked up to the concierge desk in the lobby downstairs and forced a smile. “I need a taxi to JFK, please.”
* * *
“Jesus, man. You really have no game, do you?” Heath asked, giving Murphy an exasperated stare. “Did I or did I not warn you not to get involved with her like that?”
“If you hurt her, I will gut you,” Daveed growled from the armchair across from them.
“No one’s hurting anyone, dammit.” Murphy took off his hat and tossed it on the sofa cushion beside him then ran a hand through his hair. “It was an affair between two consenting adults and it’s none of your business.”
“Shayma is my friend,” Mel said, chiming in as she perched on the arm of the chair beside Daveed, his hand resting possessively on her hip. “That makes it my business.”
Jaw clenched, Murphy scowled down at the coffee table before them and the tiny computer card Heath had tossed there. “The only business I care about right now is finding my sister. I’m praying you guys found out something while you were undercover as Lawrence’s aides tonight?”
Daveed exhaled slowly, then pulled Mel into his lap. “We’ve confirmed he’s definitely working on some kind of deal with EnKor. He received numerous phone calls from them through the evening, specifically from Frank Kent.”
“And now that I cloned his phone, we should have access to all those calls. If he tries to contact anyone from here on out with that cell, we’ll know who, when, where, and why.”
“When I was close to the senator, near the dance floor, I heard him tell you guys that he was working on a deal with EnKor and he didn’t want any competition. Any idea what that deal was?”
“No,” Daveed said. “It’s odd too, since I’ve had some of my Energy Department contacts looking through the EnKor files for patents, registrations, etc. Seems there’s no record of them even existing two years ago.”
“How is that possible?” Murphy frowned. “According to their website, they’ve got all sorts of utility patents pending for their clean energy designs and have millions of testimonials to their service and products. Patents take time to file and it can take years to build a customer base of thousands, let alone millions.”
“Sounds like EnKor might be embellishing the truth a bit.” Heath sat back and crossed his arms over his immaculate tailored black suit. “Speaking of embellishing the truth, what exactly were your intentions toward Shayma? She agreed to keep an eye on you for me and I don’t like to see my friends hurt.”
Keep an eye on him? Like Murphy was some kind of freak that needed tending.
He slumped back against the sofa and glared at his friend. At least Heath had finally shaved off that godawful beard that made him look nearly homeless. No wonder Murphy hadn’t recognized him in the shadows. Then again, he’d been a bit distracted too, by Shayma.
Ugh. Just the thought of her made the center of his chest burn once more, right over where his heart thumped hard. Each time he closed his eyes, the hurt he’d seen in her beautiful eyes at the Ritz blended with the regal set of her shoulders here in the suite before she’d walked out of his life forever, and made him want to drop to his knees and beg her forgiveness, beg her to take him back and teach him to trust again.
But it was too late now. She was gone and they’d both have to deal with the consequences. He needed to learn how to go on without her, no matter how bleak things would be alone. He’d find Aileen, then he’d re-up for the SEALs and head back overseas on the first mission they offered him. Maybe being under constant threat of death would help ease the pain of his eviscerated heart.
“What are you going to do?” Heath asked, watching him with a narrowed gaze.
“About?” Murphy asked, being deliberately obtuse. He just wasn’t in the mood to talk about things yet. All of it was too raw, too confused, too real.
“About the fucking Elf on the Shelf,” Heath snapped, his irritated expression morphing into full-blown anger. “What the hell do you think I’m talking about? You make a decision about the military yet?”
Murphy scrubbed a hand over his face. “I’m signing on for another tour.”
“Seriously?” Daveed shook his head. “Why? What about your sister? What about the rest of your life?”
“What about it?” Agitated, Murphy pushed to his feet and paced the room. “I’m not like you guys, okay? I don’t have anything else. The SEALs are it for me. If I call the recruitment office now, I won’t have to report until mid-January. That will give me time to find Aileen and get her back home safe. The rest of it doesn’t matter anymore. Like I said, the SEALs are my life. That’s it.”
“And whose fault is that, huh?” Heath asked. “You are the most—”
“Stubborn? Pigheaded? Stupid?” Murphy gave a mirthless chuckle. “Believe me, I’ve heard it all. And it’s right. I am way too stubborn for my own good. Rebellious too. And don’t forget independent. I’ve had to be. It’s how I survived. Aileen too.” He squeezed his eyes shut, seeing Shayma’s gorgeous smile, felt her gentle touch, and his soul shattered all over again. “I’ve lived like this for so long, I don’t know how to turn it off anymore. That’s why I’m alone. Why I’ll stay alone for the rest of my life.”
“Is that really what you want?” Mel rose from Daveed’s lap and came over to him, blocking his path. “To die alone and lonely in some foreign land?”
Hell no, it wasn’t. But after the way he’d behaved with Shayma, it was all he deserved. He shrugged in answer to Mel’s question. “It’s my decision.”