Until June (Until Her 2)

Swallowing hard, I close my eyes against the pain in my chest, because I know she’s right. I just don’t know if Evan’s that person. I did know before; I knew it with every fiber of my being. Now? Now I’m not so sure.

“What did he say that got him back in?” she asks, and it takes me a moment to understand she’s asking why he was suddenly in my house after, as she put it, I made it clear I wanted nothing to do with him.

“He didn’t say anything to me. My sister’s husband heard him say he wasn’t good enough for me.” I shake my head, pulling a chunk of hair away from my face. “I… I wanted him to know that wasn’t the case, that he was always good enough, so I told him that.”

Nodding, her eyes go softer and she mutters, “Selfless.”

“What?”

“When you love someone, really love them, you will do whatever is necessary to protect that person, even if you’re protecting them from you.”

“I didn’t need him protecting me from him.”

“You think that, but my guess is he didn’t feel the same way.”

“I don’t know. We haven’t talked about it. When I ask him, he says ‘later.’ I don’t even know what the hell that means.”

“Later means just that—later. I’m sure he’s not looking forward to sharing his burden with you. I also doubt he wants to do that after he’s just gotten you back.”

“We’re having sex, JJ. I don’t think that qualifies as us getting back together.”

“Did you tell him that?” She raises her brows.

“No,” I mutter.

“Exactly.” She grins then jumps off her stool. “I gotta get home. My man is cool, but if I don’t feed him before he heads out, we got problems.” She must read my face, because her smile turns wicked when she confides, “Honey, trust me when I tell you the punishments he doles out are always a win for me.”

“Oh,” I whisper, and she tosses her head back laughing then picks up the bottle of tequila and heads for the door. I walk behind her and she stops and turns to me. “Take the chance, girl. I know you’re scared, and I know he fucked up before, but I got a good feeling about this and I’m rarely ever wrong.”

“Thanks for the talk and the drinks.” I lean in, giving her a hug but not an answer. Shaking her head, she opens the door and walks out on her heels, down the sidewalk, then across our lawns. Stopping on her front porch, she waves once and disappears from sight when she goes into her house.

Closing the door behind me, I lean back against it. I don’t feel better after that talk. If anything, I feel more conflicted. Rather than thinking about it anymore, since I had been doing nothing but that all day, I head for my bathroom and turn on the tub’s faucet. One of the reasons I bought my house was because of the bathtub. Three people could fit comfortably in it, and it has six powerful jets that turn it into an indoor hot tub.

Starting the water, I wander into my room to find my cell phone. I turn it on airplane mode, so that it won’t annoy me, and then find my headphones and start up Adele. Going back into the bathroom, I turn on my electric candles and shut off the light. I close the door then gather my hair on top of my head, strip out of my clothes, dump a ton of peach-scented bubble bath under the running water, and climb in. It doesn’t take me long to find peace and for the sound of Adele to take me away.

Blinking at the sudden bright light that fills the bathroom, it takes a second for my eyes to adjust. As soon as they do, a scream rips up the back of my throat and I scramble back in the tub, losing Adele as my ear buds fall from my ears. Sloshing water onto the floor, I stand as a man wearing a ski mask watches me from across the room.

Reaching my hand out blindly, I find a towel and cover myself, not taking the chance of pulling my eyes from him to look for something to use as a weapon. Panting, blood sings loudly though my veins as I keep my eyes on him, waiting to see what he does so I can counter his movement. He doesn’t move, doesn’t breathe or even make a noise. He just stares at me, his bright green eyes surrounded by black fabric fixed on mine.

I don’t know how long we stand there staring at each other. It could be seconds, or minutes, but without a word or a backward glance, he walks out. Hurrying from the tub, I stumble to the door, slam it closed, and click the lock in place. Searching the room for my cell phone, I see it at the bottom of the tub. I move to the vanity and pull out the drawers, dumping the contents onto the floor.