“Pick anything. The point is to have a whole bunch of fun. Don’t overthink it. It’s just Halloween,” she said.
“Easy for you to say. I’ve never dressed up.”
“Never?” she asked.
“Not once.”
“How come?”
He sighed. “Let’s just say my childhood didn’t exactly believe in fun.”
“Okay, totally understand. Well, think about what you used to love as a kid. You must have seen some costumes growing up. What were the ones that stood out to you?”
Dylan sighed and went toward the clown costumes. There was an abundance of them. “I’ve got it.”
“Okay. Take care.” Raine hung up, and Dylan stared at the costume.
In his home, clowns were feared.
They were terrifying, and Dylan recalled vaguely wanting to terrify someone in his own home. Wanting to find a way for them to back the fuck off, and to let him live.
He pulled the costume off the rail and went to the checkout. The young man behind the counter smiled. “Excellent choice. Clown costumes have been pretty popular. Do you remember that craze of a couple of years ago?”
Dylan smiled, pulled out his card, and handed it to the checkout.
He didn’t like how his old memories had surfaced. Ones he kept locked up tight as he didn’t like to remember them. Where Max didn’t like to feel or talk much about emotions, Dylan had gone the opposite way, and he was a talker. Living in a house where emotions had to be constantly locked up, for the longest time, he felt like he was a drowning man with no way to escape. The moment he’d been old enough, he’d left.
He pushed those feelings right back down. They had no room in his world as a grownup.
Chapter Eight
A couple of days later
Max went to drop Lake off at her friend’s house. He sat in the car as his niece didn’t move. Her suitcase was beside her.
Tapping his fingers on the steering wheel, he glanced out the car. The neighborhood looked amazing. Each house was decorated, joining in on the creative fun. He could imagine Raine’s house looking equally as delightful.
“Are you okay, sweetheart?” he asked.
Raine and Dylan were back at the house, getting their cauldrons filled with sweets. Raine had done a quick mad dash to the store because he’d forgotten to get the extra candy she asked for.
He didn’t see them having too many kids visiting. Having thought that, he’d seen a lot of kids and grownups out in the street.
“What if they don’t like me?” Lake said.
Max glanced in the rearview mirror at his niece.
Raine had gotten her dressed up as a fairy princess. Glitter and sequins, and fake diamonds were on her face and outfit. They’d spent the last part of yesterday finishing the costume.
Running his fingers through his hair, he tried to think of what to say to Lake. This was where he wasn’t good with words, feelings, or dealing with emotions. Unbuckling his seatbelt, he climbed out of the car and rounded the vehicle toward her.
Opening the door, he saw she hadn’t even removed her seatbelt. Her hands were clasped together, and he saw them shaking a little bit.
“It doesn’t matter if they don’t like you, Lake, sweetheart.”
He didn’t like the way she kept gripping her hands, so tightly as if she was afraid. He covered her hands with his own. Crouching down so he was on eye level with her, he smiled. “Do you want to go to this party?” he asked.
She nodded.
“And you were invited.”
Another nod.
“Then I can only see one way of doing this. We’ve got to get you to that party.”
“But, Uncle Max, I’m afraid.” She squeezed his hand so tightly.
“What are you afraid of?”
She shrugged. “They’re going to laugh at me. I look dumb.” Her bottom lip came out.
Don’t be a dick. She’s five years old. Lost her mother, forced to live with you.
“You know, as a kid, I used to hate Halloween.”
“You did?”
“Yeah, I did. I never saw the fun in dressing up. I thought it was all a bunch of fakes, but your mother, my sister, she wouldn’t take no for an answer. She told me it’s a night where I can pretend to be whatever the hell I wanted to be, even if that meant I could be myself.”
“What did you do?” Lake asked.
“I was myself, and for one night of the year, no one complained. I could not give a crap about any of it. About fitting in. About caring. Tonight, everyone wears a mask, even you, Lake. You can be whatever the hell you want to be. So if you want to be a moody fairy, then you get to be a moody fairy. If you don’t want to go to this party and have lots of fun and get drunk on candy, you tell me, and I will take you home right now. You do not have to do anything you don’t want to do.” He was never given the choice growing up. He was forced every single day to play a role he didn’t want.