The Ranger's Passionate Love

"Hey, I didn't say I didn't like my mom's!"

"You didn't have to. No one likes your mom's cooking. She's great in bed, though." The sound of scuffling chairs followed, quickly cut off by a young woman's voice.

"If either of you two dickweeds spill my meatloaf, I will kill you myself."

"You're eating meatloaf? I thought that stuff was, like, banned by the Geneva Convention or something."

"You're thinking of the school meatloaf. Try this instead," said the girl's voice.

It went on like that.

After the eating sounds had died down, Crystal decided the time had come. Sweeping into the dining room with her hands raised, she faced the group of teens.

"Ladies and Gentlemen," announced Crystal.

"And dickweeds," added another girl.

"And dickweeds," allowed Crystal without missing a beat. "I give you the provider of tonight's feast."

Kyara took that as her cue, and stepped into the dining hall.

The teens sat around the empty remains of their plates, sprawled backwards in their chairs. They applauded her as she came in. Kyara smiled at the absurdity of the situation.

Crystal gestured imperiously for the applause to stop, and it died away.

"Now," the girl announced, her voice mock-serious. "You have tasted of this divine bounty, and found it good."

"Yup," said one boy.

"More chicken!" called out another.

A third just belched, loudly. The girl next to him swatted at him, then stole a remaining green bean off his plate.

"So," thundered Crystal, her voice carrying over them all. "Now you all must face a terrible choice." She looked around at each of the other teens, he eyes squinted in faux-menace.

I really hope this wasn't just to be silly worried Kyara. I don't see how it keeps us open. I mean, teenagers liking to eat isn't exactly news.

"Either," continued Crystal, "you may go away, never to eat like this again." a chorus of 'boos' met her words, the other teens now getting into the spirit of the act. Crystal seemed gratified, playing off the response.

"Or you may eat like this again, but you must ..." Crystal hung her head for a moment before lifting it and speaking in her best ho

rror-movie trailer voice, "bring your parents back with you next week. To eat with you. In public."

"Booooo" cried one boy.

"Arg," cried another, clutching dramatically at his chest.

French-fry stealing girl stood, gesturing for her friends to stop.

"You drive a hard and terrible bargain," announced the girl, her tone matching Crystal's. "But you know you leave us with no choice at all. We shall return next week. As long as there is more meatloaf."

All eyes turned to Kyara, who stood completely bemused by the pageant unfolding in front of her.

"You're all really weird," Kyara said. "But yeah, there can be meatloaf."

The teens roared their approval, Kyara laughing along with them.

The next Tuesday found Kyara in her kitchen staring at a list of ideas for a new menu. Out in the dining area, the rest of the trail project was gathering. Kyara hadn't joined them yet, telling herself the menu took priority. She hadn't put it in place yet, but it looked like she was going to have to. Word was already spreading. Today she'd had three people ask for cornbread that wasn't on the current menu.