Ecstasy (Notorious 4)

“I will never forget him,” she said softly, her hand rising to her breast. “I will always keep his memory here, in my heart.”

Kell covered her hand with his own, his expression as grave as she had ever seen it. “Do you think you could find a place in your heart for me as well, Raven? Please, tell me I’m not too late.”

A thrill of hope ran through her. Hope and longing and joy. “No.” Her throat constricting with relief, she managed a husky whisper. “You aren’t too late.”

His long lashes hooded his dark gaze. “And yet you planned to leave me. You intended to put an ocean’s distance between us.”

She refused to look away. “Because I couldn’t bear to stay, believing you hated me. I thought my going would make it easier for you to seek a divorce.”

“Is that what you want? A divorce?”

“No,” she said emphatically. “Not at all. I only thought you would be happier without me as your wife.”

His fingers clenched over hers. “I would sooner cut out my heart than lose you, Raven. I don’t think I could bear to live without you. Not when I love you so much.”

Her breath caught in her throat. “What did you say?”

“I said I love you.”

Her gaze riveted on him. “You truly mean it?”

“Truly. I’ve loved you for a very long time.” Kell cradled her face in his hands. “You made me love you, vixen. You turned my heart upside down and brought light into my life. How could I not love you?”

Elation swept through her, but she remained speechless.

“I should have told you before now,” Kell murmured, gently exploring her face with his fingers, as a blind man might. “I didn’t dare admit my feelings for fear of frightening you off. You’d told me numerous times you would never let yourself love anyone, and I couldn’t see how to overcome your resistance. You married me only to escape the scandal. And I let Sean hurt you yet again. You lost O’Malley because of him. I didn’t think you could forgive me for that, or that I deserved forgiveness.”

“Kell, there is nothing to forgive. You couldn’t be your brother’s keeper.”

“I know that now. Sean caused so much pain,” he said quietly. “But in a way, I am grateful to him. He gave me you. If not for him, we never would have met, let alone married.” Kell hesitated, his dark gaze holding her captive, his voice dropping to a hushed but fervent prayer. “When I learned you were leaving, I had to take the risk. I want ours to be a real marriage, Raven. I want you to be my wife in truth. I want to be your husband, your lover, the father of your children. Please say you will give me another chance.”

The hunger in his eyes was soul-deep and made her yearn to reassure him. “Yes, Kell. Oh, yes.”

His face eased, as if she had given him a reprieve from death. “I only wish…I hope to God that someday you can come to love me in return. I know how much you fear it-”

Raven reached up to touch his sensual lips, silencing him. “I already do love you, Kell. With all my heart.”

Fire kindled in his eyes. He made a raw sound in his throat as he bent his head to kiss her. When his mouth covered hers in a wordless murmur of yearning, need, and hope, Raven clung to him, returning his kiss with the same fervor.

They were both breathing rapidly when he finally broke off. But he didn’t release her. Instead he held her closer.

“God, how I have missed you,” he whispered against her hair.

Raven sighed, pressing her face into his shoulder. “I never really expected to see you again. I didn’t think you ever meant to return. Emma said you intended to relinquish the club to her.”

“No, I was planning to come to London, even before Dare arrived. I hoped I could convince you to come away with me.”

“Away?” His comment puzzled her. “Where would you want to go?”

“Somewhere-anywhere-that doesn’t hold memories of my brother. In fact, the West Indies sounds like an ideal place. Would you mind very much if I accompanied you?”

She felt her heart fill with gladness. “I would like that above anything.”

“You won’t mind leaving England?”

“No. I don’t want to remain here any longer.”

“But what of your dream? I thought claiming your rightful place in society was crucial to you.”