To Tame a Dangerous Lord (Courtship Wars 5)
Page 62
Madeline was very aware, also, that she was not Rayne’s first choice of brides. The beautiful Roslyn might have been standing here instead had she not married her duke.
Madeline swallowed as a pang of sadness twisted inside her. Her father had fairly worshiped her mother, and she’d wanted that kind of profound devotion for herself. Yet now she was prepared to settle for much less. She wanted Rayne to be, if not happy in their marriage, then unassailed by regrets at the irrevocable step he was taking today.
The ceremony was over swiftly, practically before Madeline realized it. Rayne favored her with a brief kiss to seal the union. Then together they accepted felicitations from the various guests.
Madeline responded to the good wishes with a forced smile, until Freddie’s bluntness roused her genuine amusement.
“I confess myself disappointed that Rayne actually got himself leg-shackled,” Freddie said, shaking his head sorrowfully. “But if he had to do it, you are likely the best choice he could have made, Madeline.”
“Thank you for the compliment, I think,” she murmured with a strangled laugh.
“Oh, my admiration of you is utterly sincere,” Freddie protested. “You and I would never suit, but you and Rayne … well, you just might. He needs a wife who can hold her own, and you certainly have no fear of standing up to him.”
Under most circumstances, that was true, Madeline agreed silently, except that now her wedding night loomed ahead of her—a fact that Freddie was quick to remind her of.
“I plan to take myself home this evening directly after dinner,” he announced, “so that you and Rayne may have Riverwood to yourselves. I have doubtless overstayed my welcome as it is.”
The ceremony was to be followed immediately by a small dinner celebration, but Madeline wanted to implore Freddie to stay afterward so she could postpone the inevitable as long as possible.
She scarcely ate a bite during dinner, although she fortified herself with a significant quantity of wine. Despite her intention to pretend nonchalance, she stole frequent glances at her new husband where he was seated at the head of the table on her left. She couldn’t stop thinking about the consummation that lay in store for her or calm the butterflies that were rioting inside her at the prospect.
The physical aspects did not really worry her overmuch. Thankfully, Arabella had told her something of what to expect—that she might feel pain and discomfort her first time, but that a considerate lover would make the experience as pleasurable as possible. And she had no doubt that Rayne would be considerate of her virginal state.
What worried Madeline was that giving him her body would leave her even more vulnerable to him than she was now.
Fortunately for the sake of their dinner guests, Rayne carried on the bulk of the conversation with their company. Not that the two happily married couples at the table paid much regard to her near silence.
Madeline couldn’t help but notice how contented Arabella seemed with her earl and Roslyn with her duke. Judging by their conversation and their mutually tender glances, it was perfectly clear that both ladies were very much in love—and that their love was returned wholeheartedly.
Which in itself was a little disheartening to Madeline, since her marriage fell far short in comparison. And all too soon she stood with her husband in the entrance hall, saying farewell to their guests.
When after their departure, Rayne took up a brace of lit candles to lead her upstairs, Madeline accompanied him reluctantly.
“Are you suffering an illness, love?” he asked as they reached the second floor where his bedchamber was no doubt located. “You scarcely spoke a word at dinner. It is not like you to be so mute.”
“I am perfectly fine,” she lied, walking beside him down the long corridor.
Nerves clustered in her stomach as he ushered her inside a luxurious chamber.
“This suite will be yours,” Rayne informed her. “You’ll find your trunk and bandbox in the adjacent dressing room. And your sitting room is to your right.”
It was clearly a lady’s bedchamber, done in shades of pale blue and rose, Madeline saw with some surprise while wondering why he hadn’t directed her to the master’s suite. But perhaps he meant to spend the night here with her.
She watched silently as Rayne shut and locked the bedchamber door behind them. Then he set the candles down on a table and went to the hearth to stir the flames.
“I asked that the fire be built up,” he added casually. “I mean to keep you warm tonight, but until then, I don’t want you to grow chilled.”
Madeline swallowed at the implication that they would be naked together.
When she made no reply, he asked in that same easy voice, “Are you worried that I might ravish you?”
To be truthful, she was worried that he would not. He would be doing his duty, attempting to beget an heir, but dutifully servicing her was a far cry from being an ardent lover.
“No,” she answered unevenly, “I am not worried about ravishment.”
Rayne set aside the poker and turned to face her, his intense gaze leveled at her. “You have nothing to fear from me, Madeline.”
“That is easy for you to say, since you have done this countless times before.”