“You said you wanted a life of adventure,” Heath prodded when she remained silent.
“I did at one time,” she admitted. “But not now. I gave up that dream when I came to London.”
“You gave it up?”
Lily nodded. “I realized I must make a choice. I will no longer have the means to afford travel since I plan to spend my modest fortune on my new cause, helping needy women avoid a life of prostitution. In fact, I am thinking of starting a home for poor women and unwed mothers. I hope to better their lives if I can, and improve their sad conditions so they won’t be trapped in lives they abhor. Even if our boarders no longer need my help now, there are many destitute and desperate women who do.”
“I see,” Heath responded, regarding her solemnly. “But you needn’t give up your dream of adventure, Lily. As my wife, you can both see the world and help needy women. It is one of the prime advantages of wedding me.”
Lily’s laugh was strained. “But the disadvantages are rather significant. I would have to wed you first.”
Heath shook his head. “Wedding me is not a condition of accepting my gift. Naturally I would like to accompany you on your voyages, but that is your choice.”
She held up the deed. “What is this then, a bribe to persuade me to accept your proposal?”
“No. It is just as I said. I am offering you the means to fulfill your dream. Granted, I would also like you to see that our life together could be a grand adventure. And for you to realize that your fears about maintaining your independence after our marriage are unfounded. As my wife, you wouldn’t be under the thumb of a dictatorial husband. You could live your life very much as you choose.”
She hesitated a long moment, torn by conflicting emotions. “You know I cannot accept something so outrageously expensive. It would make me too indebted to you.”
Heath shrugged. “The decision is entirely up to you, sweeting. You can sell the Zephyr and donate the proceeds to one of Miss Blanchard’s charities if you wish. Or use it to start your home for unfortunate women.”
Lily swallowed, feeling that odd little ache in her throat again. She was greatly touched by his generosity. And dismayed as well.
Heath understood her yearning. Before becoming involved with the women at the boardinghouse, traveling the world had been her deepest desire. She still longed for adventure, even though an even greater desire had supplanted it in her heart. And his offer was so very tempting.
As if reading her thoughts, Heath took her hand and led her to the table where a map of the world was spread out. With a sweeping gesture, he indicated the various continents and oceans. “Where would you go first if you could?”
Reluctantly Lily glanced down at the map. France lay there beckoning. And Italy. And Spain. And the Alps. And countless other places she longed to see. During the many years of wars with Napoleon’s armies, those countries had been far too dangerous for visitors, but now the wars were over…
“I could take you there,” Heath murmured, his low tone all too beguiling.
Wistfully, Lily trailed her forefinger over the map, letting her touch linger on the Mediterranean. In her mind’s eye she could picture the splendid beauty she had only read about. Azure seas. Dazzling sunlight. Pristine beaches. Palm trees gently waving in the warm breeze.
“Thank you, but no,” she finally said with a regretful sigh.
When she handed the deed back to Heath, he merely laid it on the table. Then he reached up to untie the strings of her bonnet, removing it and her veil.
Lily gave him a quizzical look. “Heath…what are you doing?”
“I am undressing you.”
She froze. “I thought you said you wouldn’t make love to me again.”
He gave her a lazy smile as he made short work of the pins holding her coiffure in place. “I changed my mind.”
A small thrill ran through her. “But you don’t want to risk making me enceinte.”
“True.” From an inner pocket of his coat he withdrew a small pouch that Lily recognized. It held the sponges Peg had given her.
“I kept this from last night,” Heath informed her.
Her heart began racing. “Does this mean you have reconsidered allowing me to become your mistress?”
“No, but you are welcome to be my mistress as well as my wife. You can be as passionate and wild as you want-and respectable at the same time.”
“Heath…” she began in protest, but he took her face in his hands and kissed her once, slowly. The tender gesture left her spellbound.
“I mean to take you on a map of the world, Lily. Surely you can comprehend the symbolism.”