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Amazing Grace (The American Soldier Collection 3)

Page 45

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There was so much about her that he admired, and he wanted to know her better, learn everything about her. For the first time in years he was the one pursuing instead of the one being pursued.

“Is dinner ready?” Sandman asked.

“Yes, and I’m looking forward to dessert,” Big Jay said then winked at Grace, making her blush before she shyly turned away and checked on the meal.

* * * *

The four of them sat around the island in the kitchen eating and talking. Grace was happy that they complimented her cooking and truly seemed to be enjoying themselves. It was funny to watch the three tough, big men banter over silly things like who was responsible for what chores. It was crazy when the conversation turned to who could shoot a gun farther and with more accuracy.

She chuckled as she took a sip from her wine glass.

“Hey, Grace, you have brothers. Did you argue with them or did you always get along?” Duke asked and the others became silent.

“We had our moments but for the most part we got along great.”

“Oh sure, you never argued or stopped speaking to any of them for days?” Big Jay asked. She shook her head.

“My dad got sick with cancer when I was young. It was tough on my mom trying to raise five kids herself. We didn’t want to make matters worse so we really tried our hardest to behave. I think that’s why we’re so close to one another now, too.”

Big Jay smiled at her but Sandman looked serious.

“Your family does seem very close. I didn’t know about your father. If you don’t mind me asking, why did you leave them, Grace?”

She took a deep breath then looked at each of them. “It wasn’t an easy decision. My sister Clara and I looked like twins. So often people would confuse us, calling us by the other person’s name. We were only fourteen months apart and were very close.” She paused a moment.

“After she was murdered, my family life turned into a complete mess. It’s not something everyone can understand or comprehend. There’s a big difference between someone dying from an illness, disease or even an accident, than someone being murdered. Clara was alive one moment and the next she was dead. She was robbed of everything. The rest of us were alive.” She looked away from him.

She felt Big Jay place a hand on her knee. She turned to look at him.

“You shouldn’t feel guilty because Clara was killed and you’re alive.”

“You don’t understand, Big Jay. I can’t help but to feel guilty. Part of why I left was the guilt I felt looking like her, feeling I had to act like her. It’s what my family wanted. Everything I did was compared to Clara. The way I even combed my hair, or walked down the street. Everyone including my family did that to me. At first I didn’t mind, believe me it made me feel even closer to Clara, but then it got crazy. I started to feel as if I didn’t exist. Can you understand what I mean?” she asked him.

“Yes. I think I do. You were feeling smothered and controlled which made you feel out of control and dependent. You started to give in to them treating you like Clara instead of remembering that you were Grace, your own person,” Sandman said.

She was shocked at his response.

She smiled at him softly.

“Exactly. God, I wish I met you two years ago. It’s like you understand because you feel or felt the same way yourself once,” she said to him.

“I think I kind of felt that way before I called it quits with the Marine Corps. I had no idea who I was when I returned after fighting in the war multiple tours. It was like I became a name and a number. I’m not sure if we would have hit it off if we met back then, Grace. You needed those years to become so independent. To figure out who Grace was and what she wanted.” Sandman gently brushed a piece of her hair away from her eyes.

“You’re right about that, it was a tough move. I cried a lot and even went as far as buying a plane ticket home only two weeks after leaving. I talked myself out of it and decided that was exactly what my family wanted and expected. The new me wasn’t going to be like that. So that became my new motto. Every time there was a decision to make in my new life, I’d ask myself one simple question. What does the new me want to do? And in doing so I became who I am today.”

“Well I think you did a great job. I definitely like the new you, although I suppose one would say I’m biased considering the intimacy we just shared,” Duke said then winked. She of course felt her cheeks warm as she shyly looked down to her lap.

“I’m so glad that I met you guys. I’m not glad that these circumstances brought us together, but the one positive is the three of you.”

Big Jay leaned over and kissed her on the lips. She placed her palms against both of his cheeks and kissed him back. When they finally ended the kiss, they leaned foreheads together and smiled.

“I think I’m ready for dessert now,” Big Jay whispered and Grace chuckled as her pussy clenched and her heart soared to the highest level she’d ever felt before.

* * * *

Donald couldn’t stop thinking about Sarah. He called the house, surprised that Eric wasn’t screening the calls. He would be doing that if Sarah were his wife. Donald ran a hand through his hair. He knew that was never going to happen. She was with Eric, despite his attempts at letting her know he had wanted her. Being best friends with her husband Frank Sr., who died suddenly, placed him right beside Sarah during the mourning process until Eric arrived on scene. The man came out of nowhere and swept Sarah off her feet. He knew how to control the media. He knew how to gain Sarah’s full attention. Donald failed in that department.

“You sound funny, Donald. Are you holding up okay?” she asked. Sarah was the one who was suffering.



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