All the Little Secrets (English Prep 2)

Chapter Twenty-Three

Piper

My lip stung from biting it so many times. The pastries I’d had for brunch with my parents tasted great in the moment, but now they were threatening to come back up as Hayley and I drove to Eric’s cabin.

I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t know where to start. Did I start at the beginning? Did I just come out and tell her I was sorry? Because I was. I didn’t like hiding things from her, and when I sat down and thought about it, it wasn’t fair in the least. I knew all about Hayley’s past. I’d been with her through some scary stuff. We’d been chased off the road together—that definitely formed a bond between two people, right?

As soon as I’d parked on the cobblestone lot in front of the cabin, I did everything I could to calm myself down. I took in the stone pillars and focused on the different sized rocks, counting each one until I felt I was ready to talk. I turned the music down, and Hayley smiled at me patiently. And I knew, right then, that I needed to tell her. So I spilled everything.

It probably only took ten minutes to fill her in on Jason and the drama within the walls of my house, but it felt like it took eons. I was drained, but strangely, I felt lighter.

Hayley pulled her dark hair into a high ponytail before unbuckling her seatbelt. “Is this why you were so open to my shit? My past?”

I shrugged, biting my sore lip again. I was back to staring at the stone pillars. “I guess. I…I don’t know why I didn’t tell you.” I quickly shook my head. “Wait, yes I do.” When Hayley and I met each other’s gazes, I felt a tug in my heart. I had felt sorry for her life, the stuff she had gone through, and I knew she hated that. She didn’t want pity, but I had felt it anyway. Hayley didn’t deserve the shit she went through. There was so much negativity already in her life, so why would I have poured even more onto her?

Hayley sat up a little taller, bringing her legs up to sit cross-legged. “So, why?”

“Well, the first reason is because you had way too much going on in your own life to take on my family drama. I mean, why would I let all of that out when you just got into a stable living environment?” The more I explained to Hayley, the lighter I felt. The bricks stacked on my shoulders fell off one by one. “I didn’t want to bombard you with it. And my parents have driven it into my head to never talk about what happens behind closed doors.” I wrung my hands together in my lap. “They even took me out of Wellington Prep and moved us to the other side of town, thrusting us into yet another rich society just so we could hide the mess in our family. They completely shut Jason out of our lives. There aren’t even family photos of him hanging up in the house anymore.”

Not only did I feel angry about that, I felt hurt, too. I knew Jason was making mistakes. I knew he was in way too deep, but if the thought of him being shunned from our family hurt me, I couldn’t even imagine how it felt for him. Or maybe he didn’t care at all. Did addicts have feelings? Or did everything and everyone they’d ever cared about slowly dissipate, and their worries morphed into where the next party was? Or when they’d be able to get high again?

Slowly, I brought my head over and rested it along the window. I had the urge to bang it off of it a few times to get the thoughts to stop. “I told Jason last night that I was done with him when Ollie and I finished cleaning up his mess.” I turned to look at Hayley who was fiddling with the locket around her neck. “I have to figure out how to get Ollie out of this mess. This is all my fault, Hayley.”

Hayley frowned as she reached over and put her small hand on my leg. She gave it a squeeze. “We will figure it out. Not you. You’re not in this alone, okay?”

Just then, Christian walked out of the cabin and leaned along one of the stone pillars. Hayley’s cheeks turned pink as she smiled through the windshield before turning back to me. “I love you; Christian loves you; Ollie loves you; and I’m pretty sure Eric does, too, even though he’s even grumpier than Christian now.” A light laugh fell between us. “And I know very well there is something more going on with you and Ollie.”

I desperately tried to catch the butterflies flying in my stomach. “Why do you say that?”

Hayley was fighting a smile, the apples of her cheeks twitching. “You’re going to be pissed when I tell you what he did.”

The butterflies stopped abruptly. “What did he do?”

“He may or may not have banned every guy from asking you to the winter formal.”

My mouth fell. “Wait. The winter formal?”

Hayley let out a loud laugh, plopping her legs back down. “Winter formal? Remember, this weekend? Aren’t you on the committee?”

Shit. This time, I really did hit my head off the window. “Damnit! I have shit to make for that. Decorations. And I don’t have a dress.” Oh my God. See! This was how I knew I was in way too deep with Jason’s shit! I was leading a double life. High school was still on the horizon. College acceptance letters would be coming soon. Those things hadn’t crossed my mind in a while.

I sighed. “I don’t even have a date!”

Hayley was quick to add, “Yeah! Because of Ollie.”

“Wait.” I flung myself up from resting along the glass. “He did what?” I’m going to kill him. “Ugh!” I opened my door and stepped outside onto the uneven pebbles.

Hayley was giggling as she followed me up the stairs. She was loving this. She secretly liked seeing Ollie get under my skin. I was pretty sure everyone did.

Christian pushed off the stone pillar and placed his arm over Hayley’s shoulder. “Everything okay? Are you ready for the gang to help?”

I was fuming underneath my skin. I couldn’t believe Ollie had banned everyone from asking me to the dance. Not only was I annoyed with Ollie for doing that, I was almost irritated that a twisted part of me liked knowing he didn’t want me going with any

one else. Why was it like this with us?

One minute, I wanted to punch him and push him away, and the next, I was basking in his touch and pulling him in close.

Hayley snickered under her breath as she filled Christian in. “I just told Piper that Ollie banned everyone from taking her to winter formal.”