Yours Truly, Cammie

Work was a shit show. Literally. I got shit on while preparing to put a catheter into an elderly patient. But it ended up being a huge, celebratory, throw-a-party type of moment because that meant progress for him! Yay for shitting!

By the way, how are the restrooms over there? Alex complained about them in every single email to me when he was there. Whenever you find yourself complaining about the smell, just think about the fact that I LITERALLY had shit on my arm.

P.S.S.S. I really did wreck your car. She only has a few scratches…

To:

From:

Subject: Enough about shit…

Body:

Every single guy laughed their ass off when I told them that you got shit on. They also messed with me and asked if I had received any sexy pictures of you in a nurse’s outfit?

….What do ya say, Doc?

I’m already picturing it…

P.S.S.S.S. Stop lying to me, Cammie. I know you didn’t wreck it. YOU BETTER NOT HAVE. I will make my mom drive up there and check on it.

I swear to God.

Then you would have to hide because she wants to meet you.

To:

From:

RE: Subject: Enough about shit…

Body:

Does that mean you told your mom about me? I feel so special. This definitely means you like-like me a lot.

Sexy-nurse pic? Hmmm…. I’ll think about it. ; )

Your last email took a while, are things bad over there? Lots of blackouts?

I may or may not be worrying.

XO

To:

From:

Subject: Sexy nurse pic, now

Body:

Things are rough. Sorry that it’s been taking me so long. Just know that I look forward to your emails more than I have looked forward to anything ever in my life.

Even Santa.

I definitely like-like you… more than a lot.

I’m still waiting on that pic… my imagination resources are limited when it comes to you. I’ve only been inside you a few times. I need more.