We laughed all night, especially at my rendition of the song the Haitians sang for us as we departed from the village. My parents ‘ooh’ and ‘awed’ at all my pictures that I’d taken on my phone. I already missed Haiti, I probably could have stayed there the entire summer, especially if that meant avoiding Rowen. My throat constricts at the thought of returning to work tomorrow as I toss and turn under my covers. You would think that I would be exhausted from my time in Haiti and traveling back home but nope, I can’t seem to shut my brain off. I think I finally fall asleep to a little “Rowen chant” that I made up in a desperate measure to stop obsessing over the next day.
It’s my first day back at the country club, but it’s been open for almost three weeks now, which means everyone is probably in the groove and wondering where I am… especially Rowen. I can’t help the series of gymnastic flips that occurs in my stomach as I replay all the different scenarios in my head. He probably thinks that I don’t forgive him and that I would rather stick a needle in my eye than be his friend, which isn’t true, not at all. I thought about contacting him a few times and letting him know I’d be coming back to work and that I’d be late, but I ended up chickening out every time. It shouldn’t matter this much… right?
After giving myself a pep-talk about becoming Rowen’s friend and no longer an enemy, or worse yet, his girlfriend, I climb out of my car and head into the Country Club with a nervous pit in my stomach. I’m so nervous that I can feel my hands trembling. I’m first greeted by Sash, who all but tackles me in a hug. A little put off at first, I struggle out of his arms and he eyes me cautiously.
“Sorry, we just missed you.” My eyebrows crinkle and I laugh a little. I didn’t realize I was so beloved here.
“I missed you guys, too. I hope no one drowned while I was in Haiti,” I joke back and then freeze in my spot when I hear his smooth voice. My heart picks up its pace and I take in a big gulp of air.
“Haiti? You were in Haiti?” I turn around slowly and take in the beautiful male standing behind me. Rowen’s face is tanned and even more sculpted than last summer, which causes me to curse the angels who created him because holy shit, he is beautiful.
“Yeah, I was over there for an internship. No one told you?” He looked right into my eyes and shook his head.
“Oh, yeah. Well, I’m back now for the summer.” Things are getting awkward as I stand between Sash, who welcomed me back like the hero that I am, and Rowen, who is looking at me like the little kid in that one movie where he sees all the ghosts.
Sash clasps his hands and smirks at the pair of us, “Okay, well, not to break up this interesting welcome-back charade, but you two need to get to your stands.”
I hurriedly go to the lockers and shove my things inside as I pull my long brown locks into a high ponytail. I can feel Rowen’s stare but I don’t dare answer it. Things are weird, and I’m much more nervous that I thought I’d be. You would think after all the nerve-wracking things that I’ve been through that I’d be a pro by now, but nope. Nada. Not even a little bit.
“Will you wait for me after your shift?” he asks, raising his eyebrows, eyeing my scar for a brief second.
“Well, I assumed you’d be waiting for me, again. Just like you did last year,” I say timidly and cross my arms.
“That’s only if you want me to… ” He averts his deep brown eyes when he says this, like he’s the shy one now. Ah, how the roles have changed.
“I do.” I say as I brush past him. I swear, I could hear his held breath release as I walk to my stand, welcoming the shining sun.
Thirteen
My first shift back this summer was a breeze—barely anyone was there. No bratty kids splashing one another, no tiny kids almost drowning… pretty uneventful except for the stolen stares that I got in on Rowen. I never caught his eye, thankfully, because that would be embarrassing, but I got that lingering feeling that someone was watching me; I couldn’t help but think it was him.
I didn’t recognize any of the workers this year and I’ll be glad when I have a shift with Morgan next week. We did meet up a few times over the year, but since she was in a completely different section of campus, it was hard to come by her; plus, she was known for going to all the frat parties. Surprise, surprise!
When I gather my things and walk out the familiar, hot, iron gates… Rowen is leaning on my car with his red swimming trunks and white work t-shirt on. I have to give myself a five second pep-talk on my walk over to him. Friends, be a friend. Nothing more, nothing less. Stop staring at his bulging muscles, stop it!
“Hey,” I whisper. The nerves are eating me up inside. This is a much different encounter than when we first saw each other, last summer. Then I could hide behind my anger and hurt but now, I have nothing to hide behind. It’s just him and I, in the open parking lot.
“So, does this mean you forgive me?” He straightens his posture as if he’s preparing for a punch. I stare at his chest for a few seconds before allowing my gaze to level on his but I wish I hadn’t. Even if I was going to say I didn’t forgive him, this moment, this hold his presence has on me, would completely throw me off… It’s… fresh, raw, and energetic, all at the same time.
“I guess it does… ” I answer and can’t help the small grin playing at my lips.
“I didn’t think you were coming back… I—” He stops talking for a beat and fidgets with his whistle hanging low beneath his neck. “I didn’t think you wanted to be my friend this summer… but I’m sure as hell glad you’re back.” He steps towards me like he wants a hug, and I can feel my eyes form into saucers. Touching is out of the question!
I back away as I put my hands up. “Under a few conditions, that is.” He stops in his tracks and his expression falls as he tilts his head, raising his right eyebrow. “We are just friends. Nothing more, nothing less. No touching, and no flirting.” I narrow my eyes as I say the word “flirting.” I literally will not be able to handle it. There are way too many memories involved with him to be acting like that. If he touches me, I’m half afraid my body will permanently marked and it’ll mock me and my unsettled feelings for him. It can’t happen.
“Okay,” he says, softly. I take the hurt in his eyes and pocket it away.
“I feel like this might be a bad idea… ” I’m almost surprised at the words flowing out of my mouth; it apparently has a mind of its own today.
“Oh, it’s definitely a bad idea.” He smiles that panty-dropping smile at
me, and I can’t help but smile back. “But I like bad ideas.” My eyes form into little slits as I’m reminded of the first time we met, when he said those exact same words to me.
We were juniors at Clayton High School and we had just lost our rival football game against Eastwick. The student section was absolutely crazy, jumping, pounding their chests, some people in tears. Samantha and I were just about to leave when Kyle announced that he had a “fantastic idea.” Half of my peers were already on their way out of the game, still throwing curse words out to the other team, but Samantha begged me to stay and listen to what Kyle had to say. I thought, at the time, that she had a crush on him but really, she probably only had her eyes set on Rowen.
Kyle announced quietly that he wanted to toilet paper the other team’s bus before they headed back home. It was a stupid idea, but Samantha, once again, begged me to help him and the few other guys that were in tune on his plan… one of them being Rowen.
There was five of us: Kyle, Rowen, Jake, Reed, Samantha, and then me. I was no doubt bored with the situation and I just knew it wouldn’t work, but they all pleaded with me to come anyway.