Dear Love, I Hate You (Easton High)

And by annoy the fuck out of each other, I mean Xavier and Finn annoyed me. RIP to all the Barbies they tossed into the barbecue that summer.

Of course, that was back when our moms could still stand each other. Turns out the only thing my mom and Delilah Emery, Xavier’s mom, ever had in common was their friendship with Nora Richards. So, when Finn’s mom died in a tragic boating accident that summer, the trio fell apart.

r /> Then everything changed.

There were no more brunches, no more playdates, no more suffering at the hands of evil little boys. Then Xavier and Finn transferred elementary schools, and I never gave them another thought.

Until I saw them waltz into Easton High like they owned the place freshman year.

Okay, that’s a lie.

I did think about Xavier a little after he evaporated from my life. But, only because of what happened at the park the last time we played together. To think we had no idea Ms. Richards would meet a tragic fate twenty-four hours later.

Right before her son’s eyes, no less.

I was hiding under the big slide in tears, choking on my snot with blood gushing out of my knee after Xavier pushed me down the jungle gym. That has to be the first and only time I’ve ever seen real emotion in this boy’s eyes.

And the emotion in his eyes was guilt.

A lot of it.

“I’m sorry. Please stop crying,” he begged. I think he was afraid of getting in trouble. It was one thing to tease me, another to literally hurt me. “I swear I didn’t mean to. I’m sorry. Please, don’t tell my dad.”

This was also the first time he’d ever been semi-nice to me.

When I didn’t stop weeping, he panicked and added, “What do you want me to do? Just tell me. Want me to kiss it better?”

I remember looking at him like he was mental for suggesting to kiss my bloody knee, and he laughed at the realization. Then he grabbed my face, wiped a tear rolling down my cheek…

And kissed me instead.

Believe me when I say that shut me right up.

Xavier Emery was my first kiss.

But he’s still an asshole.

“—heard he and Brie got into a big fight about it. She deleted some of their pics from Instagram, too.”

I snap back to reality, nodding along to my best friend’s story and wondering how she knows everything about everything. It’s barely been three days since the guys’ prank.

The weekend isn’t even over yet.

They gave us the day off on Friday. Had the fire department go around the school to make sure the boys didn’t leave us any more… surprises. I’ve never been this impatient to go back to school in my life.

Two words: Hate letter.

I’ve been obsessing over getting that stupid piece of paper back since they sent us home on Thursday. Thanks to the boys’ stunt, the library was closed all weekend, which meant no work for me, and no opportunity to burn the damn thing.

I’m probably overreacting. The odds of someone finding the letter before I do are next to zero. Ms. Callahan made it known she owns copies of all essay books to help her grading process, so she definitely won’t go looking for it, but I’m still terrified of getting caught.

“So, what’s Xavier’s punishment?” I ask. “If he took the fall, it’s got to be serious.”

“Eh, I don’t know yet.” Dia shrugs. “I don’t even think Xav knows. But since he’s a first offender and all, probably detention?” Dia’s phone chimes with a text, and she checks the screen quickly. “There’s this thing at Theo’s later. His parents are gone for the night. You in?”

“Let me think about it.” I pause. “Pass.”

“That wasn’t thinking about it,” Dia scolds.