Dear Love, I Hate You (Easton High)
Page 187
Fed up with my day, I parked in the street and bolted inside the house. They were so busy tearing each other apart that they didn’t even see me.
I hope you know what you’re doing, Ash.
You’re leaving soon.
You’re leaving and he’s staying.
Do the math.
I expel a sigh as I slam my bedroom door and collapse to the ground, back against the wooden surface. I’m so sick of crying. So sick of watching everything I love get ripped away from me.
I still can’t believe I lost it.
I lost my scholarship.
I wish I’d never written these stupid confessions.
I cry until the tears soak my shirt. Until my makeup is no more and I look like a depressed racoon. My phone pings in my pocket five times before I check the screen.
I have one text from Xavier and four from Dia.
Xavier: Who was it? They’re fucking dead.
A bitter laugh cuts through my pain. I must be delirious because I actually text him back for the first time in a week.
Aveena: Ask your mom.
The three dots pop on the screen, informing me that he’s answering, but I select my conversation with Dia so that I’m not tempted to text him again.
Dia: Are you okay? Xav said you left crying?
Dia: I’m worried.
Dia: This is about the confessions, isn’t it?
Dia: Vee, I want to help, but I can’t do that unless you tell me what’s going on.
I type a quick reply.
Aveena: They asked me to tell them Zac’s identity or I’d lose my scholarship.
Dia: Why didn’t you tell them? He’s just some guy you met at the library.
I sniffle and cradle my knees to my chest.
I can’t keep lying anymore.
She shoots me another text before I can reply.
It’s time, a voice in my head whispers.
Dia: He’s just some rando. Right??
Aveena: Wrong.
Xavier
“I’m not wearing a suit.” Theo snorts, giving Finn the finger as he throws himself onto the cloud couch in the home theater.