Dear Love, I Hate You (Easton High)

Five years in jail with the possibility of parole.

We were shocked—astounded—that something as small as confessions in a book could have such a massive ripple effect.

That’s when Xavier stopped sleeping.

He drowned in guilt for weeks on end.

Drove himself mad.

I crashed with him at the frat house he rented a room in every night after that. Spent the next month reminding him his mom had only herself to blame. Delilah Emery made her bed when she chose to have sex with a sixteen-year-old boy.

Xavier and his dad paid her a visit a month ago. After months of rejecting her family, she finally agreed to see them. Xav wasn’t up for sharing when he came back, but he looked like the weight of the world had been lifted off his shoulders, so… safe to say it went relatively well?

Things started looking up from there.

Xavier was able to halt his free falling into bottomless pits of guilt and get his head back in the game. His plan is clear: get drafted in the NBA. And I have no doubt in his capacity to attain his goals.

He always does.

I got the proof of that last month, when he blurted a spontaneous “Move in with me” while squeezing in and out of me bareback in my bunk bed. He was making love to me so savagely, his thumb spinning around my clit so hard and fast, I thought he’d finally done it.

Driven me crazy in the literal sense.

But I wasn’t hallucinating.

He’d really said it.

“What?” I moaned, clawing at his back as toe-curling pleasure exploded in my stomach.

“You.” Thrust. “Me.” Thrust. “A place?” he simplified and kissed the breath out of me, slowing down his pounding in an effort not to spill inside me, an effort that turned out to be unsuccessful, in case you were wondering.

I had my doubts for a while, said we were not ready and he’d get sick of me if we lived together, but Xav wasn’t going down without a fight. Many sneaky orgasms while Dia was asleep and conversations later, I said yes, and well, here we are. Packing our entire lives into the back of his truck, ready to drive across town and move in together.

“What are you thinking about?” Xavier’s husky voice puts an end to my dirty thoughts.

“Us having sex,” I say shamelessly. I lost my filter around this guy a long time ago.

“Funny. So am I. Should we go do that, then?” Xav smirks and boxes me in against his truck’s tailgate. He’s got that mischievous look in his eyes. The one he sports whenever he’s about to do something very dirty to me.

“Are you crazy? We’re in a public parking space.” I laugh.

Xavier scoffs, arching a mocking eyebrow, and I know what he’s about to say before he opens his mouth.

“Never stopped us before,” he teases, referring to the first time we had sex in the springs’ parking lot and his lips find mine for a kiss I’d need superhuman strength to resist.

“Xav, seriously.” I pull away with a chuckle. “We can’t. Still waiting for my period after someone didn’t pull out right after I switched pills. What if I’m late?”

“The risks are low, babe. Relax.” Xavier smacks a kiss on my temple, and I wrap my arm around his torso, bracing my head against his chest. Silence hovers around us.

“Would it be so bad if you were?” Xavier shocks me by saying.

I pull away an inch, staring up at him.

“What do you mean?”

“I’m just saying it wouldn’t be the worst thing if you did miss your period.”

“Hold that thought.” I examine him carefully, sweeping his tousled brown hair away from his eyes and skimming my fingertips over his forehead.