She could pretend all she wanted.
In this moment, he was her rock.
He just needed her to realize she could trust him a whole lot more.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t break down like this. I’ve got to be strong.”
“The only thing you need to be right now is this. Lucy wouldn’t judge you and neither do I.”
“I don’t want to cry.”
“It’ll help.”
She shook her head. “No, it won’t. It just makes me remember everything we’ve all lost. The life I wanted for Lucy. All of it.” She sniffled. “Thank you for everything you’re doing.”
“I need to thank you for today.” He stroked a strand of her hair between his fingers. “Without you, I would have been killed. I’m alive because of you.” He kissed her cheek, pulling away, giving her the space she needed. There was no reason to rush this.
Chapter Thirty-Two
Sometimes you just have to say fuck it
Sasha lay on the ground and stared at the opening in the barn roof made by age and weather. The barn showed signs of decay that had nothing to do with the end of the world. Chances were, over time it had just lived out its years rotting in this patch of land, deserted, once the home to someone or something.
Now it was just a skeleton.
It fit perfectly in their new world.
The skies were clear, the stars so bright, Sasha could have counted them. She thought about life, what it meant to have Malachi in it … and of course the kiss.
Even now her mouth tingled, and she lifted her hand to run the pads of her fingers over her lips, feeling, remembering how it felt to have Malachi pressed against her, that possessive, masculine power that poured from him seeping into every cell in her body.
She’d pushed him away, cursed him, and acted like she didn’t like it. But the truth was Sasha had. The truth was, she craved it like she’d never craved anything else before.
Sasha was inexperienced, hardly knew anything about the real world, or at least she hadn’t until all this had happened. But in this world she’d killed. She’d stolen and ravaged to make sure they stayed alive.
The one thing she wanted to experience was what it was like to be with a man. And that man was Malachi.
He’d known the world well before it turned into this. He’d been a bad man. She knew that since before he’d even uttered a word, before he told her in so many ways what type of life he’d led. And maybe it was that danger that clung to him that made Sasha feel this way, this intense desire, this burning lust?
He was on his back, one arm resting over his abdomen, his eyes closed, his breathing even. Although he seemed relaxed, sound asleep, she wasn’t fooled into thinking that if something threatened them, he wouldn’t be up in an instant.
She pushed herself up, mindful to be quiet, and just stared at him. He was so masculine, with a square jaw, full lips, and a straight nose. The beard he had was on the longer side, and although he idly scratched at it, even mentioned shaving it, the truth was she liked it.
He was all lean muscle and power. The tattoos she could see that peeked out from underneath his clothing spoke of another world, another life.
To be honest, he fit right in with the Apocalypse.
She found herself moving closer, not sure why she couldn’t control herself in this moment. She should be sleeping. They had a long ride ahead of them tomorrow, continuing to travel up north, hoping maybe there’d be safety, food.
Sasha was so close to Malachi now that she could feel his body heat. She lifted her hand, wanting to run her fingers through his beard. But at the last minute she curled her fingers into her palm, her breathing coming out raspy as her arousal rose.
His dark lashes were crescents against his cheeks, his hair on the longer side so he could tie it back at the nape of his neck if need be. God, lust coursed through her unlike anything she’d ever felt before, anything she’d ever experienced in her life.
She was about to lay back down, put all of this behind her, when he opened his eyes and looked at her. It wasn’t that he’d just woken up. No, she knew he’d been awake this whole time. Malachi had probably sensed, heard the change in her breathing. He could probably see the desire on her face.
And the air shifted, changed. She felt it start to grow thicker, warmer. She looked over at Lucy, who lay a few feet away from her. Sasha turned back to look at Malachi. This intense look was on his face.
Although Lucy slept soundly behind her, her back to Sasha, it was as if Sasha and Malachi were here alone. She imagined his mouth on hers again, his kiss taking over. This time she wouldn’t fight it, wouldn’t stop it.