Hollow Hearts (The Harkwright Trilogy)

“It’s okay, nothing to worry about. It’s just a light sprain, I’ll wrap it up, make sure to keep off it for the next few days, ice it often and you’ll be back on your feet in no time. Have you got anyone to help you back to your room? I can give you a pair of crutches and some pain killers, but I’d feel better if you have someone with you to help navigate the stairs.”

“Umm yeah, I have a friend in the waiting room,” I say, feeling confused. I mean I expected him to be professional, but not this much.

“Okay then, I’ll get you fixed up and then I’ll get your friend for you,” he gives me a smile before returning to his desk.

“Umm, what’s going on?”

“What do you mean? Sorry was there something else you wanted to discuss?” He asks, tilting his head to the side as he looks at me.

“No I guess not,” why is this hurting, didn’t I decide that I couldn’t be with him? I know I haven’t told him that yet, so surely this should make it easier.

“Very well, give me a few minutes to get you the meds and crutches and then you’ll be good to go,” he walks past and I should let him, but my body isn’t listening to sense as my hand springs out and wraps around his wrist.

He looks down at my hand but he doesn’t say anything, he doesn’t even look at me.

“I was going to tell you not to wait for me,” I whisper and I watch his jaw work as he grinds his teeth together.

“I had figured that one out already, thanks for driving the point home. Now if you could let go of me, I’d rather not prolong this.”

“Hang on a minute, why are you being like this?”

“Because you can’t decide something like that and then want me to be okay Luna, it hurts,” his voice rises and my hand falls limp against the bed. “I can’t help who I’m related to, I just didn’t think you would judge me for it,” I can see genuine pain in his eyes and I don’t like it.

Sliding my legs off the bed until they are dangling over the edge. My mind is screaming at me not to touch him again but my hand still slides to his face and although he jerks to the side, he doesn’t stop me or move away completely.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, although I feel like I should. I decided this because it wouldn’t be fair to ask you to wait when I won’t be in here waiting for you and I know you said you would be okay with that but I won’t be. I’d feel like I’m betraying you Cole and I’m trying to treat this as a business arrangement but I can’t guarantee that I can keep emotions out of this completely. What if I start to feel something for one of the guys? How is that fair to you?” My words are coming out rushed and I’m expecting a lot of reactions from him, but not a smile. Not the megawatt smile that always lights me up and steals my breath at the same time.

“Really, that’s the reason you were going to say no. Damn Luna then there’s still a chance,” he holds my face between both hands and I want to get lost in the look in his eyes and the happiness radiating from him, but I know I can’t. It’s an illusion and I can’t let myself believe in it.

“Cole it’s a pipe dream, it can’t work. Do you know how much it would kill me knowing that you were kissing, touching another girl? I can’t do that to you, and what if what we feel is just a fantasy? I can’t make you wait for something like that.”

“That’s the thing Luna, I’m not counting on a fantasy or a dream. I know what I feel and I know that I want you and if that means I wait for three years then I will. I don’t care what you have to do to survive this place, I know what it means to be here and I’m resigned to my fate. As long as you’re mine at the end of it, I will wait for you. I know you’re worth it,” he’s so close and I could kiss him so easily and fall into him.

He’s so sure about this, can I really do it? Just dive in and say fuck the consequences, I think I can but first I have to know.

“Why would your family have made me say no?”

He pulls away and starts to pace before he turns back to me and his mouth loses the smile and pulls down the edges.

“I thought you would have figured it out by now,” yeah I’m getting that feeling too, I guess this is what I get for being preoccupied and having too many things jumbling about in my mind. “Luna, I’m a Harkwright.”

18

Oh What A Masquerade

“Luna, I’m a Harkwright.”

Those words won’t stop swimming around my head, he’s left the room to get my things as I sit here and just let it sink in. I mean, I know this shouldn’t have come as a surprise. Aeron had said that he had been in the Academy, I guess I just never really put two and two together, whenever I did I came up with ten and just presumed he meant as a doctor or something.

I just, he’s Cole Stevenson. If he’s a Harkwright then why does he hide it or am I the only one who doesn’t know? The door opens and he comes in with his eyes downcast as he props the crutches next to me and puts the meds on the table.

“I don’t understand, how are you a Harkwright? Your last name is Stevenson.”

“I was born a Harkwright and I attended this Academy six years ago, I hated every minute of it. I was only here because I wanted to use its name to make it as a doctor, but it wasn’t worth it and I wasn’t willing to sell my soul to get it,” he grimaces as he looks at me. “That isn’t anything against you, but this Academy isn’t easy for every Harkwright man either. I couldn’t do the shit that was expected of me, using girls left, right and center or just being a dick in general. The worst part though was watching the girls getting beaten and used, and not being able to do anything to help them. I left after the first year, renounced my surname and went to Notre Dame University off my own merits. My decision left me disowned by my mother but I haven’t regretted a single minute of it.”

He’s looking at me but I can see the fear in his eyes, that I won’t want anything to do with him now that I know the truth.

“Cole no matter what, when I leave here I will leave free. No matter what happens I will never marry a Harkwright or be with one voluntarily. When I leave, I’ll leave the Harkwrights in my rear-view mirror and I won’t look back, not once,” he turns away from me and because of my stupid ankle, I can’t stop him. “I guess it’s a good thing you’re a Stevenson, hey.”