You Were Never Honest (Never 2)

“N-n-no,” I say, my teeth are chattering and I can’t control it.

“Okay, but if you change your mind just say the word and I’ll get you something. How about some hot chocolate, it might warm you up,” his voice sounds like it's made from melted chocolate and it definitely has a warming effect on me.

“That sounds nice, I’ll try it. Thank you Amias, you can leave after if you want,” I say in reply.

“Do you want me to leave?” he asks, and I really can’t be doing with this right now.

“I don’t know, but I’m not the best person to be around when I’m ill so if I’m a bitch to you, then that’s on you.” I’m warning him, so it’s not my fault if he ends up leaving feeling utterly insulted.

“Whatever you say love, I think I can handle poorly you. And no, I’m not leaving. You shouldn’t be on your own right now, so you’re stuck with me. Whether you like it or not.” He stares down at me, and I almost want to look away from the intensity.

“I don’t understand why you’re doing this. Do you feel bound or something, am I just a task to you?” Oh hot damn Henleigh, shut up.

“I’m doing this because I care about you, and I don’t like seeing you suffer and hurting. You could never be just a task, is that really what you think of me?” I can hear the hurt in his voice and see it in his eyes, is that what I really, truly believe?

“I warned you what would happen if you stayed,” I say, I’m not ready for him to discover that I know about him and Devon.

“I will take whatever you have to throw at me, you once said to me that I couldn’t get rid of you well the same principle applies here. I’m not going anywhere, so get used to it.” He sits down on my chair which he has pulled closer to the bed, his tone screams honesty, without his reasoning his words should feel hollow, but they don’t.

Rolling onto my side, I hate how much his words warm me. I can’t let him be a distraction, and I don’t know if I can forgive him or if he’d even want me to.

Four

The flu kicks my arse thoroughly for a week, but at least it’s gone now or pretty much. Amias wouldn’t leave my side and I still don’t know what he’s thinking regarding me, Noah and Elijah. Not that I care of course, I don’t care what he thinks. Maybe if I keep saying it, I might believe it.

I’m just glad I can get back to classes, I hate being cooped up in my room. I couldn’t read anything because it all hurt my head and eyes, and Amias would only talk about mundane crap, nothing too heavy.

Sitting in my English class, how can I not be happy that Noah is here with me. Hang on, isn’t he my boyfriend now? We might not have put a title to it, but that’s what it is. Isn’t it?

“Leighbear, did you hear the news?” He sounds positive, so it has to be good news right.

“No, I’ve been pretty much on bed rest, I’m entirely out of the loop,” I reply, brushing my fingers over the top of his hand.

I want to melt when he flips his hand over and links his fingers with mine.

“Harrison has been taken off the meds to keep him in a coma, it’s all down to him now. They don’t know if he’ll wake up, but it’s got to be good news?” Hopefulness shines back at me, he’s almost childlike in the innocence of his hope. I can’t even remember what that feels like; having hope and believing it still exists.

“Of course it is, progress is good no matter how small. Does Amias know?” I ask, hating how I can’t stop myself from caring and worry about him.

“I messaged him earlier, we’re going to grab a quick lunch and walk around the grounds. Apparently, Elijah has the need to take a lot of photos and he won’t let us get out of it,” he says but I can tell he doesn’t mind, Noah will do anything for anyone.

“Sounds good I’m sorry about last week with the bloody Shepherds, when people find out there’s going to be a lot of stuff thrown our way,” I say, but his smile tells me he doesn’t care about that.

“Leighbear, their opinions do not matter to me, yours and mine do and neither of us care. I still don’t know if this is something I could do like Lija’s parents have but I’m willing to give it a shot and if it doesn’t work, at least I can say I tried. And I think I would try a lot of things for you.” His eyes sparkle as he looks at me, and his smile matches his eyes entirely.

“You are one of the most selfless people I know Noah, I think I definitely hit the jackpot with you,” I say as we look at each other, smiling softly.

“Oh so it’s true, you really are going for anything. I guess the Shepherds have really got you pegged,” utter vitriol is spewing at me and I look up to an unknown face.

I have no idea who this girl is and I really don’t care if she wants to cast her judgement against us but a lot of people are starting to stare now and the whispering is already beginning.

“Ignore them, let's just get our classes over with and then we can follow Elijah around and try not to roll our eyes as he makes us do ridiculous poses.” He says with utter mirth in his voice, happy Noah is my favourite kind.

“Ooh, I could bring my camera,” I say with a cheeky smile.

“Oh no, there’s two of you,” he says with exasperation before we laugh and class begins.

“Okay, I’m going to grab my camera and I’ll meet you outside the canteen,” I say with a skip in my step which earns me a laugh from him.