“Wh-what? What changed your mind?” I asked.
“You did.”
“What?”
“We did.”
“I don’t understand.”
“Yesterday did,” he said.
“Yesterday.”
“Yes. You know, in the attic? Feeling you against me. I haven’t experienced that kind of passion in—well, ever.”
I watched him draw in a deep breath before his eyes fell to my lips.
“I can’t leave yet after what happened yesterday,” Gray said.
My heart flared with hope. I wanted to throw my arms around him and crash my lips against his. But I settled for allowing my hands to fall on top of his. I stroked his skin while he stroked mine, watching his gaze as it danced around my face.
“Will you stick around with me for a little while so we can get to know one another a little better?” Gray asked.
And as much as I wanted to say shout out my consent, the rational voice in my head struck up.
I wanted to give in. I wanted to say yes. I bit down onto my bottom lip to keep myself from answering too soon. What I had experienced with Gray had been nothing short of bombastic. Incredible. Unlike anything I’d ever had with a man. But if he was only going to leave next week, what was the point? What was the point of getting hooked on him even more only to have to part ways eventually? His home wasn’t here. He made it very clear he had no intentions of staying. And with the plans I’d drawn up that morning, technically, I wasn’t staying either. I was going to be town-hopping, trying to find a job.
Did he expect me to put that on hold and just sail along on his dime?
Because I wasn’t that kind of woman, and that wasn’t going to happen.
If he left tonight, maybe I could let go. It would hurt, but I’d be able to forget him soon enough. At the very least, it would give me time to shake him from my system. But if he stayed another week? If we had some torrid love affair before he left me behind anyway, could I shake that kind of attachment? I could excuse one night. But two nights? Three nights?
Every night?
I’d be too far gone. Too
attached to a man who already had one foot out the door. It would be beyond difficult to let him go, and there was a chance it could break me. Change the kind of woman I was forever when it came to men.
“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” I asked.
My eyes danced along his face as his features melted. I didn’t want to deflate his optimism. But there were too many things in play. I was grieving. He was grieving. Whatever he did for work was obviously being put on the backburner. Moving on with my life, away from Andy and this place, was being put on hold. All of it came to a standstill if we did this.
He sensed my hesitation, and I felt him pull me up from my chair and wrap me into his arms.
I melted into his embrace. Into his warmth. Into the strength of his muscles and the protection his body afforded me. I wrapped my arms around his body as his lips fell to my head, showering it with kisses that weakened my knees.
“I promise to go slow,” Gray said.
“That’s not the problem,” I said.
“Then talk to me about the problem over dinner.”
I furrowed my brow as I leaned my head up to look at him.
“What was that?” I asked.
“Talk to me about the problem over a proper date. Have dinner with me, Michelle. Just a normal date between a guy and a girl wanting to get to know one another. I’ll cook you dinner and we can eat out on the patio while the sun sets. Nothing extravagant. Nothing over-the-top. Just dinner and conversation. Possibly with my leg pressed against yours.”