Falling in Love Again: A Valentine's Day Proposal

“Y…yes, of course it is. Who did you think it was?”

“It’s been years, Anna. Why would I suddenly think you’re calling me now?”

“I have the same… the same number. I haven’t changed it.”

“I deleted it,” I reply coldly. “Unless you don’t remember what happened.”

There’s silence for a few moments. We’re both digesting the memory of the past. I guess Anna wanted to skate past that as if it didn’t happen, but I refuse to let her. Not when I’m still suffering.

“What do you want, Anna? I presume you haven’t just called me for a chat.”

“I do… I do want to speak to you, but I can’t do it over the phone.”

My chest tightens. “Why not?”

“Because it’s bad, Carter. Please. I want to see you. I’m already on the way to the office because I know that’s where you’ll be. I just wanted to give you a head’s up so you don’t immediately chuck me out. You know for a fact that I wouldn’t come to you if I wasn’t desperate. I just need your help.”

“Where are you?” I ask, basically asking if I can send her away.

“I’m nearly there.” The closer she gets, the more it sounds like the tears are drying up. I can’t trust anything that comes out of her mouth. No amount of time can change that, clearly. “I won’t be a minute.”

“Right sure.” I huff, wondering if there’s any way that this day can get any worse. It’s like the universe wants to punish me for something. I’d love to make up for it, but I don’t know what it is! “I guess I will see you soon then. Obviously, you cannot stay long though…”

“Because work comes first, I know. I was married to you, remember?”

If she comes in here trying to blame her cheating on me, I will lose my mind. The mood that I’m in, she really doesn’t want to mess with me. She could get yelled at for all the rage that I have pent up inside. I’ll say everything that I didn’t get to at the time, and then some! This could get ugly.

18

Raelyn

I tap my pen repeatedly on the desk, my mind off elsewhere. I might look like I’m working, but I’m not really. The paper work is all there and some of it has been completed, but right now, I’m at a standstill and I don’t know how to drag myself out of this funk. I think I just need to see him, that’s the issue.

Why is he avoiding me? Why won’t he see me? No one else can see what’s going on, but I can. To me, it’s very obvious. For some reason, Carter is completely avoiding me. He doesn’t want to speak to me. I don’t know why, but that much is obvious. The only thing I can assume is that he’s punishing me. I ran away last time and now he’s effectively doing the same to me. I suppose I can’t really be mad about it.

If he would just let me in, if he’d just talk to me, then I could tell him what I want to, I could let him know that I like him. Just to see what’s going on with him. When I arrived this morning, I wasn’t one hundred percent sure what I was going to do, I still hadn’t made a choice, but the more that he ignores me, the more I want to just tell him. I would rather prefer to be out there then we can see. The uncertainty is killing me.

“Are you okay, Raelyn?” Leon asks me quietly. “You look a bit agitated today.”

“Huh?” I blink a couple of time, entering reality once more. “Oh right, yes, I am. I just… I want to see Carter. I need to speak to him about some things but he’s been impossible to pin down today.”

“Is everything okay?” Leon furrows his eyebrows. “Everything is running smoothly?”

A heat burns in me, this is pretty embarrassing. “Oh yes, everything is okay. I just need to consult with him.”

“Ah right, well it seems like he’s been in a meeting for most of the day.”

“He has?” This isn’t really any of my business, the bits and bobs of running his company doesn’t directly affect me. But I want to know. I don’t know why, but it feels really important. “With who?”

“I don’t know. Some blonde woman. She looked like a bit of a nutter, to be honest.”

“Why is Carter doing business with her then? That seems really weird.”

“I don’t know if it’s business necessarily. I suppose it could be part of his private life. I can’t imagine that he’s the sort of man to conduct his affairs in the office, but I might be wrong.”

Shit. I know for sure that he’s the sort of man to conduct his affairs in the office because I have been a part of that. I wonder if this is the same thing, brazenly in front of me. Well, not directly in front of me, but close enough. In the same building that I’m in, right under my nose. Can I be mad about that? I certainly feel mad. But I suppose I can’t be really. There isn’t anything official between us and I did go on a date last night, as terrible as it was. Still, I’m hurt and upset. I like Carter but I might not really be anything to him.

I clutch my stomach, sickness swirling. I’m going to end up getting hurt here, badly hurt. I already feel a lot of pain and barely nothing has happened yet. God, I’m a real idiot.