Secret Desires (Roughshod Rollers MC 4)

Lily’s eyes water and she throws herself at me.

“Thanks, Dad,” she says tearfully.

“Just remember, this computer isn’t just yours,” I warn. “We’re going to set it up here in the living room, and you and I will negotiate times, alright?” I let my stern expression fall and I smile softly. “But I’m glad you like it. Happy birthday, Lily.”

Getting this computer for Lily took everything I had. In the end, I borrowed the money from Georgia and all of our friends, though not as much as I thought I would have to when my boss, hearing me speaking to Trevor about it, offered me some extra work to help out. With luck, I’ll be able to pay all my friends back in the next few months without worrying about bills or what we’ll eat. Georgia offered to help out in that area, too, but I refused; she has her own bills to think about. It’s enough for me that she’ll sometimes cook dinner for us, or take us to the movies or theme parks for a fun day out. I also believe she might be slipping Lily some pocket money, but I’m turning a blind eye to that since I can’t afford to do it myself.

For the first time, though, I was able to get Lily something she really wanted, regardless of how it happened. Now that she has her game console, I can also start putting a little money aside to get her some games for both it and the computer, which will be nowhere near as expensive as the computer itself was.

“I hope you’ve had a wonderful day,” I say to my daughter, kissing the top of her head. “And tomorrow is going to be fun, too.”

“Did you pick up the piñata?” Lily mumbles into my shoulder.

I laugh.

“Of course,” I reply.

We head back to the dining room, one of Lily’s new hair clips in her braid, and sit down for dinner. Lily excitedly tells us about the games she wants to play, such as pass the parcel and pin the tail on the donkey, and I nod along with a smile despite the fact that she’s given me this exact same spiel several times this week. After dinner, I light eleven candles on the chocolate cake and carry it over to the table, Georgia and I singing Happy Birthday off-key, making Lily laugh. She coos over the carefully sculpted chocolate roses on the cake.

Once we’re done, full of stir fry and chocolate cake, Lily darts off to turn on her new console, making me promise to help set up the computer once Georgia and I have finished cleaning up. I watch her go, unable to help the smile stretching across my lips. She’s so happy and that makes me feel good.

“Did you pick up the sponge cake for tomorrow?” Georgia asks me.

“I did,” I assure her. “It’s in the fridge. It looks amazing.”

“How many kids are we going to have tomorrow?” Georgia asks.

“Fifteen,” I say with a laugh. “It’s going to be a handful. I’m throwing them all outside to play.”

“As long as the weather holds,” Georgia points out.

I grimace. The season is changing as the weather starts getting colder, and black clouds have been threatening us overhead all day. So far the rain has held off, and I can only hope that lasts until tomorrow.

“If it doesn’t, we can make it a pool party,” I joke. “The puddles will be big enough, right?”

“Their parents might have a little to say about that,” Georgia grins.

In quiet conten

tment, the two of us begin clearing away the plates from dinner and dessert. I hear the sound of Lily’s game blaring from the living room.

Nothing has changed since Georgia and I got together. I can’t believe how easy it was to fall into a relationship, and then I remember that we’ve been in a relationship for a long time. The only difference is that now we touch and kiss each other. Every time I think this, it makes me feel so blind and stupid. I almost let Georgia go because I’d managed to convince myself I could never feel anything other than friendship for her.

“Hey, I saw those applications on your desk yesterday,” Georgia says casually. “What’s all that about?”

I smile.

“I was hoping to surprise you,” I say to her. “I’ve been looking at doing an online college degree.”

“Really?” Georgia asks, looking up. “What in?”

I smile softly.

“Before Lily was born…do you remember what I wanted to do?” I ask. “I pushed it back because we didn’t have a lot of money, and I wasn’t smart enough to get in on a scholarship. Then I married Polly, then Lily was born, and then everything else happened… I just never got round to it.”

“I…think?” Georgia says, face screwed up in thought.

“I wanted to do architecture,” I tell her, laughing. “I’m not surprised you don’t remember. I tried not to talk too much about it because my dad hated hearing me speak about it. He wanted me to play football, but I hated it. Polly and I spoke about it a lot, but those dreams died completely when she left.” I look down at the table and smile. “But maybe it’s time to give it a go, you know?”