Protect me from Jodi. The more time that passes, the more ridiculous that idea is. She’s saved me, dragged me up from an unfeeling place that I didn’t even know I was in, and made me so fucking happy. Now we’re in love, and life couldn’t be better. Everything really has turned out just as it was supposed to.
“Well, we don’t need protecting, do we, Jodi?” I turn to see my woman, who has her face buried in her phone.
“Hmm?” She just about manages to drag her eyes upward. “What was that?”
“I was just saying that we don’t need protecting from each other, do we?”
“Why would we need protecting?” All the color drains from her face. “From what?”
“I . . .” I shake my head, realizing the time has passed. “Never mind. Shall we get some drinks in?”
“So this is your casino?” Millie looks around, impressed. “It’s really nice, isn’t it? You’ve done a good job. You’ve done all of this from nothing and turned it into a very successful company.”
“Oh, well, yes, I’ve done what I can.” I indicate for a waiter to come over. “What do you want to drink?”
As everyone reels off their order, I stare at Jodi, trying to work out what’s going on with her. Ever since she started talking about Thomas earlier this week, she’s been more closed down than ever before. Now she keeps looking at her phone as if it holds all the answers to life. I have a funny feeling that it’s got a lot more to do with this mysterious Lucas than it does with Thomas. I’m not sure why, but I have a funny feeling he isn’t the issue.
I look at Josh, who tosses his head back and laughs at something Millie says, wondering if he’s a better judge of character than I am. Maybe he saw things in Jodi immediately that I was too blinded to see. Perhaps he could see that this whole mess was going to end up with my heart broken, and that could be happening right now . . .
Is this Lucas another man in Jodi’s life? Am I a fool to believe that love is enough? Maybe the reason all the guys get obsessed with her is because she doesn’t love any of them. Maybe she’s a cold-hearted praying mantis.
That version of her doesn’t match up to what I’ve seen, what I know of Jodi, but something doesn’t quite add up. There’s a side to her that she keeps resolutely hidden from me. Maybe there’s a reason for that.
“Ooh, drinks are here.” Millie’s voice shatters through my thought barrier. “Looks lovely.”
“Yeah, the cocktails here are amazing,” Jodi pipes up. She smiles, but I can see it’s strained. “Really nice.”
“You should have brought me here sooner. It’s incredible.”
“Jodi hasn’t been downstairs much herself.” Josh thinks it’s appropriate to comment. “She’s usually all tied up, upstairs, if you know what I mean.” He finishes that with an unwelcome seedy wink.
I boom out with laughter, trying to distract everyone from the unnecessary nature of that remark. “Thanks for that, Josh, that was great. Millie, why don’t we talk about you instead? Shut Josh up.”
Millie rolls into her life story, and I nod and make agreeable noises wherever I feel appropriate, but I’m barely focused on her at all. Jodi is back on her phone, furiously typing away, her expression changing with every message. Something is going on, and I can’t tell if it’s bad or good. It’s killing me inside.
I want her to look at me, to let me in, to show me more of herself, but she won’t. She has concrete walls built around her, and there’s no dragging them down. I’m not as much a part of her life as I thought.
“So your boyfriend has moved in?” Josh asks Millie. “How’s that going?”
“Oh, it’s great actually. It’s really strengthened things between us.”
Maybe that’s what I need to do. Ask her to live with me. We’re in love after all . . .
No. I shake my head rapidly, trying to rid my brain of that crazy thought. I can’t act all irrationally. I can’t start moving at the speed of light just because I’m freaked out. I made that mistake once before, and it didn
’t exactly work out in my favor. I need to just let what’s happening happen and go from there.
It’s hard to think ‘what will be, will be’ when it comes to Jodi, but I need to. Otherwise, I really will lose her.
“Hold on a moment, I just need to get to the bathroom. I’ll be right back.”
Jodi bolts up from her seat and races away. It doesn’t escape my notice that she has her cell phone clutched so tightly in her fingers as she runs that her knuckles have turned white. She isn’t going to the bathroom at all—she’s going to make a call. Undoubtedly to this fucking asshole Lucas.
Jealous coils through me like a nasty, bitter snake. It leaves a trail of agony racing through my body, infecting every single part of me until my whole body feels green. I can’t take it anymore.
“Is something going on?” I ask Millie rapidly. “With Jodi, I mean? She’s acting all crazy.”
Millie leans forward, resting her arms on the table, and I think for one glorious moment that I’m going to get some answers. The need to know twists painfully in my gut, but she ends up just shaking her head.