A hand snakes over his shoulder, one that I’m sure belongs to Jenny who’s usually his calming influence, but he shakes her off not wanting any of it. This fury won’t be tamed which is a nightmare for me.
“Yes, Brandon,” I insist quietly. “It’s been going on for a while but it isn’t just a sex thing. There’s something going on between me and Zane. There’s real feelings between us. If you’ll just take a moment to listen to us…”
“Feelings,” Brandon scoffs. “Fucking hell, Leah, how thick are you? Feelings. Zane doesn’t do feelings. He just fucks around for fun. What the hell is wrong with you?” His eyes widen as a shock hits him. “Oh my God, is this why you broke up with Patrick? Please tell me you didn’t do it for Zane.”
I part my lips wanting to argue, because it wasn’t just because of that… but the words don’t come. I can’t lie, if Zane hadn’t come back here, me and Patrick would still be together, but I would also still be at my job. Just because he sparked the changes, doesn’t mean I broke up directly with Patrick for Zane.
“Oh, fucking hell, what is going on, Leah? When the hell did you lose your head? I wasn’t worried about you before, I assumed that you were just going through some stuff, but now I’m really freaked out.”
I roll my eyes and throw my hands in the air in frustration. “Brandon, I don’t want to be a bitch but this isn’t really any of your business. What I do, who I date, it’s up to me. I’m twenty one now, I’m old enough to make my own decisions in life, and that includes who I date. Right now, I want to be with Zane.”
Zane smiles at me as I make something of a sweeping declaration of my feelings for him. I hope that he understands that I can’t say too much because I don’t want to wind Brandon up further, but I do have strong feelings for him. I know for a fact that it could turn into even more if we have enough time.
I reach out and grab onto Zane’s hand to show a united front. I hope that with Jenny by his side, Brandon will calm down once he realizes that this is serious. This is more than he assumes it to be.
“Oh, hell no,” Brandon yells the second Zane’s skin brushes against mine. His entire face turns a shade of purple, “There’s no way I’m going to stand for this. You cannot act this way, either of you, you’re fucking done.”
It’s almost as if a red mist descends in front of his eyes as Brandon rolls up the sleeves to his shirt. He looks like he’s gearing up for a fight, which is crazy. I haven’t ever seen him fight before, even when we were younger. We can’t have pushed him this far, he cannot seriously be this against us together. I always knew that my brother wouldn’t like it, and I’ll admit the way he found out isn’t ideal, but surely, he’ll listen to reason.
“Brandon, wait, no.” I press my hands into his chest, trying my hardest to stop him. “Don’t do this. Please, let’s just go down stairs and talk about this properly. Don’t do something that you’ll end up regretting.”
Brandon looks at me for a moment, and for a split second I think I might have got through to him. But then he swings his fist back and he flies past me at a million miles an hour. Everything’s a blur, I barely even know what’s even happening anymore. Not until I hear a scream coming out of Jenny’s mouth, telling me that something terrible has gone on. I snap out of my stupor and turn to face the mess behind me.
“Oh my God.” I clap my hands to my mouth as blood spurts out of Zane’s nose. “Brandon!”
“Brandon, mate, just stop it. Neither of us want to fight.” Zane tries to be kind, despite the fact that he’s been hit in the face. “Let’s just leave it for now and talk about it later, okay? We need to calm down.”
Zane tries to push past my brother to get out before things get worse, but Brandon’s on fire now. He shoves Zane violently until he crashes into my desk, knocking everything on it to the floor. One of my photo frames smashes loudly as it hits the ground. Thank God all of my college work is at Zane’s house or I’d be mad.
“Fuck you, Zane,” Brandon growls. “I don’t ever want to speak to you again.”
I don’t know what happens next, I can barely see it. Fists fly in every single direction as Brandon lashes out and Zane does what he can to defend himself. I keep trying to get in the middle of them to separate them, but I’m pushed to the side every single time. They’re determined not to let me stop this.
“Just get out of my room,” I eventually yell. “Stop fucking fighting.”
I know now that Mom can definitely hear this. There’s no way that she doesn’t know there’s a fight going on down the hallway from where she is. The fact that she isn’t in here tells me that she doesn’t care. She’s so mad at me and she hates Zane so much that she’s willing to let this just play out. That makes me so furious I could scream. I need to get out of this house even more so than before. I truly hate it here.
Zane tries to escape. I don’t
think he really wants to fight, even though he’s had some truly terrible things said to him tonight, but Brandon follows him. They fight through the hallway, they lash out down the stairs, and I can even hear things crashing about as they stagger towards the front door.
“Stop it,” I scream over and over again. “Why won’t you just stop it?”
Jenny holds onto me, she prevents me from going downstairs and getting in the middle of it again, and I sob into her chest. This day has gone so far downhill that I don’t know what to do with myself. I already knew that all my life choices weren’t going to be very popular, but I had no idea they would cause this reaction. The blood spots all over my bedroom carpet will always remind me that I’ll never be accepted.
“I’ve never seen Brandon like this,” I weep against her. “It’s so horrible.”
“I know, I know,” Jenny reassures me as best she can, rubbing her arms comfortingly up and down my arms. “But he cares about you so much. This is all because he cares about you.”
I don’t want to hear that, I know that much. I’m aware that my brother’s intentions are good but that doesn’t make it any easier to deal with. I just wish that none of this had happened. It’s all my fault, I’m the one who lost control. I’m the one who pounced on Zane and encouraged him to have sex with me. If I hadn’t, if I’d just behaved while we were inside my home then none of this would have happened.
“We need to stop them fighting,” I insist. “We can’t let this carry on. Someone will call the cops in a moment then we’ll all be in major trouble. We have to stop them before they hurt themselves.”
Jenny reluctantly follows me down the stairs. I can tell that she’s scared too, but she’s trying to keep her distance because she doesn’t want to end up in trouble. She’s seen me getting thrown to one side more than once so she wisely knows that there isn’t anything that she can really do. But I’m still determined.
As soon as my foot reaches the bottom step, I hear Zane’s bike roaring to life. I race to the door, staring hopelessly after him as he races away. I’m glad that he doesn’t look too hurt, but I can’t believe he’s leaving me.
“And don’t you ever come back!” Brandon yells, with blood splattered down his torn shirt. “I don’t ever want to see your face again. I know lawyers, don’t you forget that.”