"It's not your fault," I told him. I started thinking, and wondered how he didn't suspect me. "How are things with your wife?" There was a pause.
"She's staying at her mother’s house," he told me. There was another pause. "So you knew that she was seeing your roommate all along?" I bit my lip.
"Yea," I admitted.
"So, that's how you got the pictures? You took them?" He asked me. Tears sprung up in my eyes.
"Yes," I answered.
"How'd you know she was my wife?" He asked me. I weighed the question over in my mind.
"She told us," I answered.
"So your roommate knew that she was married and she slept with her anyway?! While you took pictures?!" He yelled. Then he hung up on me. I fell back onto the pillows. Everything was unraveling and I didn't know how to fix it. My stomach growled. On top of everything, I was hungry. I checked the time on my phone. Dinner time. I got up and out of bed and got dressed. The rest of the apartment was quiet when I left my room. The door to Gemma's room was shut. I didn't know if she was here or not and I didn't really want to find out. I left the apartment and walked to the dining hall alone. When I got there, it was crowded. I scanned the place for Gemma, but I didn't see her. I got in line and grabbed two slices of pepperoni pizza, then went to get some soda. With my tray in hand, I tried to find an empty table, but there were none. Then I saw Richard smiling and waving me over. I grinned, happy that he was happy to see me. I made my way over to join him.
"Hey," I said once I was seated.
"Hey," he said. "How's it going?" I wished that I could tell him. Anybody! Keeping everything to myself was destroying me! I really wished that I could tell Gemma. We were supposed to be friends and I hadn't been a friend to her lately. All of a sudden, I was crying. Richard looked alarmed. "Are you alright?" I couldn't speak so I just shook my head. My body shook with silent sobs. Richard grabbed a bunch of napkins and handed them to me. I wiped my face and took a sip of my soda.
"I'm fine," I told him but he was not convinced.
"You look anything but fine," he said. He looked so concerned that it made me start crying all over again. I didn't deserve it! I didn't deserve to have everyone worrying about me!
"I'm sorry," I said through sobs. He just handed me more napkins.
"You don't have to apologize. It's ok," he assured me, but I knew that it wasn't ok. I was a bad person and I had fucked over and lied to all of these people. Used all of these people. I deserved to cry. I deserved worse! My phone started ringing in my pocket. I took it out and looked at the screen. Professor Moore was calling me.
"I've got to take this," I said, sniffling and wiping my face. Richard nodded understandingly. I stood up and pressed 'Answer' as I walked away from the table.
"Hello?" I answered. There was no answer. "Hello?" I repeated.
"I want to know everything and if you can't be honest with me then you will never hear from me again, understood?" Professor Moore said in a grave voice. I was out in the hall where no one could hear. I stood off to the side by a plant and a window. I nodded.
"Yes, I understand," I answered. When he didn't say anything else, I took a deep breath. "When I found out that you were married, I was devastated. I would have never slept with you or even pursued you or tempted you in any kind of way if I had known. I'm not like that. When I left your office that day, I ran into your wife and accidentally took her phone. I gave it to my roommate to give to her while I went to class, only I had no intentions of going to class. My roommate invited your wife in for tea. I stole ecstasy pills from my roommate’s room and slipped it in their tea. When they started hooking up, I took the pictures," I said. I could hear him breathing heavily so I paused.
"You drugged my wife?!" He roared.
"Yes," I said quietly.
"You're fuckin crazy! Are you out of your mind?!" He shouted. I cringed and looked out the window. Maybe. "Why?" He asked. I was quiet. "Why did you do it?!" He demanded.
"Because I thought that if given the opportunity, your wife would cheat too and you'd definitely get a divorce!" I spit the words out as quickly as I could. A sob erupted from my chest, tears refilled my eyes.
"I can't believe this. You've destroyed my marriage," he accused me. I crumpled to the floor, sobbing. Professor Moore hung up on me. I had fucked everything up and now everyone hated me. I heard footsteps and a shadow was cast over me. When I looked up, Richard was standing over me holding a plate wrapped in napkins. He held out his hand to me.
"Let me walk you home," he said. I took his hand and he helped me stand up.
"What's in the plate?" I asked him as we walked out the building.
"Your pizza," he told me. I smiled.
"Why are you so nice?" I asked him. He smiled and shrugged.
"I don't know," he answered. As we walked, I thought about how easy things could be if I loved Richard instead of Professor Moore. But I didn't love Richard and things were damn near impossible.
When we got to my apartment building, Richard handed me the plate.
"Thank you, for all of this," I said with a smile.