‘I'm so sorry! Please forgive me?’
‘I hope that you are alright.’
‘Please, call me when you get these messages.’
His voicemails said about the same things. He didn't know what was going on! Now, I laughed. Hysterically. Until tears fell from my eyes. Until Gemma yelled at me to shut the hell up. I think that I was actually going insane. I called Professor Moore. He answered on the first ring.
"Hey, are you ok?" He asked me as soon as he answered the phone.
"Yea, I'm fine. How are you?" I asked him.
"I'm alright. I'm sorry about all that. This is a mess," he said.
"It's not your fault," I told him. I started thinking, and wondered how he didn't suspect me. "How are things with your wife?" There was a pause.
"She's staying at her mother’s house," he told me. There was another pause. "So you knew that she was seeing your roommate all along?" I bit my lip.
"Yea," I admitted.
"So, that's how you got the pictures? You took them?" He asked me. Tears sprung up in my eyes.
"Yes," I answered.
"How'd you know she was my wife?" He asked me. I weighed the question over in my mind.
"She told us," I answered.
"So your roommate knew that she was married and she slept with her anyway?! While you took pictures?!" He yelled. Then he hung up on me. I fell back onto the pillows. Everything was unraveling and I didn't know how to fix it. My stomach growled. On top of everything, I was hungry. I checked the time on my phone. Dinner time. I got up and out of bed and got dressed. The rest of the apartment was quiet when I left my room. The door to Gemma's room was shut. I didn't know if she was here or not and I didn't really want to find out. I left the apartment and walked to the dining hall alone. When I got there, it was crowded. I scanned the place for Gemma, but I didn't see her. I got in line and grabbed two slices of pepperoni pizza, then went to get some soda. With my tray in hand, I tried to find an empty table, but there were none. Then I saw Richard smiling and waving me over. I grinned, happy that he was happy to see me. I made my way over to join him.
"Hey," I said once I was seated.
"Hey," he said. "How's it going?" I wished that I could tell him. Anybody! Keeping everything to myself was destroying me! I really wished that I could tell Gemma. We were supposed to be friends and I hadn't been a friend to her lately. All of a sudden, I was crying. Richard looked alarmed. "Are you alright?" I couldn't speak so I just shook my head. My body shook with silent sobs. Richard grabbed a bunch of napkins and handed them to me. I wiped my face and took a sip of my soda.
"I'm fine," I told him but he was not convinced.
"You look anything but fine," he said. He looked so concerned that it made me start crying all over again. I didn't deserve it! I didn't deserve to have everyone worrying about me!
"I'm sorry," I said through sobs. He just handed me more napkins.
"You don't have to apologize. It's ok," he assured me, but I knew that it wasn't ok. I was a bad person and I had fucked over and lied to all of these people. Used all of these people. I deserved to cry. I deserved worse! My phone started ringing in my pocket. I took it out and looked at the screen. Professor Moore was calling me.
"I've got to take this," I said, sniffling and wiping my face. Richard nodded understandingly. I stood up and pressed 'Answer' as I walked away from the table.
"Hello?" I answered. There was no answer. "Hello?" I repeated.
"I want to know everything and if you can't be honest with me then you will never hear from me again, understood?" Professor Moore said in a grave voice. I was out in the hall where no one could hear. I stood off to the side by a plant and a window. I nodded.
"Yes, I understand," I answered. When he didn't say anything else, I took a deep breath. "When I found out that you were married, I was devastated. I would have never slept with you or even pursued you or tempted you in any kind of way if I had known. I'm not like that. When I left your office that day, I ran into your wife and accidentally took her phone. I gave it to my roommate to give to her while I went to class, only I had no intentions of going to class. My roommate invited your wife in for tea. I stole ecstasy pills from my roommate’s room and slipped it in their tea. When they started hooking up, I took the pictures," I said. I could hear him breathing heavily so I paused.
"You drugged my wife?!" He roared.
"Yes," I said quietly.
"You're fuckin crazy! Are you out of your mind?!" He shouted. I cringed and looked out the window. Maybe. "Why?" He asked. I was quiet. "Why did you do it?!" He demanded.
"Because I thought that if given the opportunity, your wife would cheat too and you'd definitely get a divorce!" I spit the words out as quickly as I could. A sob erupted from my chest, tears refilled my eyes.
"I can't believe this. You've destroyed my marriage," he accused me. I crumpled to the floor, sobbing. Professor Moore hung up on me. I had fucked everything up and now everyone hated me. I heard footsteps and a shadow was cast over me. When I looked up, Richard was standing over me holding a plate wrapped in napkins. He held out his hand to me.