Broken

“Nothing baby, just watch your show,” I said, kissing the top of his head and leaning back into the couch.

Seth was alert and aware that something was wrong and I was having a hard time hiding it from him. What started as an amazing trip turned into a nightmare and I was scanning through my brain trying to come up with a solution. It was just like me to think I could get Seth and me out of anything bad, to want to protect him from seeing or hearing anything that would scare him in the least. However, this was a situation I was pretty sure I wouldn’t be able to hide from him for much longer. He was smart and he had seen the police in the street, taking down protesters. I kicked myself for waiting so long before moving him onto the couch. He was just a baby, he didn’t need to see any of this.

“There are people down there that have something they want to say,” I explained to Seth. “They want to be free to make their own choices but they feel the only way to do that is to shout it really loud.”

“Is it illegal?”

“No.” I laughed at his brilliance. “Not exactly. But the police, they don’t want them to be here so now they are angry at each other. Things are different here than they are at home.”

“Are they going to hurt us?” His face looked sad and it immediately broke my heart.

“I’ll never let anyone hurt you,” I said, looking him straight in the eyes. “Everything will be okay. We are going to wait here for Dex and then we can figure it all out.”

I closed my eyes and thought about how we got there. We were having the most amazing honeymoon before we decided to take this business call. I was so worried about not leaving Dex’s side that I didn’t even think about the political unrest going on here. I had been following it on the news at home for weeks but when it came to jetting off with my new husband, everything just kind of left my mind. No wonder my mother seemed so nervous about me bringing Seth here. She told me to be safe in her worried tone before we left but I didn’t think anything more than the fact that Seth had never traveled overseas before. How stupid was it that I didn’t even connect the uprisings to where I was taking my family? I should have told Dex not to go, to do it remotely, but instead all I could think about was being with my husband. Nothing else mattered and now, these were the consequences of my thoughtless actions.

I picked my cell phone back up and tried to call Dex again but the calls were still being blocked. I got up and grabbed the hotel phone, calling down to the desk. The woman answered but it was so loud I couldn’t hear what she was saying. I hung up and dialed Dex’s cell phone number, hoping I could get through on the landline but even the landline did nothing but beep feverishly in my ear. I was so worried about being up here in the hotel that I hadn’t taken two seconds to think about the fact that Dex was down there in the middle of it all. Instantly, my heart began beating rapidly as I worried that something might have happened to him in the streets with all these protesters. What if they took over his car? What if he was trying to get to me and got injured in the process? The police didn’t know who were guests and who were protesters and his life could be in serious danger. To say that I was terrified would have downplaying it by leagues. At that point, my hands were shaking so bad I could barely hold onto the remote as I switched back to the local station.

As the live feed popped up

on the screen, I froze, the remote falling from my hand and bouncing into the floor. The police had started to push in toward the protesters and they were running into the hotel. The doors were broken, glass was everywhere, and people were rolling around choking on the smoke bombs the police had thrown into the crowds. I flipped the news off and stopped, realizing the sounds of gun fire and rumbling were no longer coming from the television. I stood up and ran over to the emergency exit, grabbing a chair and lodging it under the handle. It would be locked from the outside but so was the door midway down and from the sounds of it, the protesters had made their way up to the top floor. If they could break through that door, they would be able to get through the front door. There were two emergency exits, one on the inside and one on the outside that the stairwell leads from the roof to the lobby.

Immediately, I turned and grabbed Seth off the couch and headed for the bathroom. I set him down and locked the door, pulled him into the bathtub with me and held him tightly in my arms. I didn’t know what else to do or where else to go at that moment. Seth was now scared, trembling in my arms as he realized I was scared too. The only thing I could think about was Dex and where he was. What if he had come to get me and got caught up in the crowd? What if one of those gunshots was meant for him? I couldn’t even control my thoughts at that moment. Terror flooded my body. I wrapped my arms around Seth and buried my face in his hair. I didn’t know where else to go or what else to do except barricade myself in that bathroom and hope that someone got to us before the police or protesters. As we sat there waiting, I thought about Dex, our history and the way that our lives had gone to bring us to this place. Though we were sitting here in danger, I didn’t regret Dex, I regretted not being more responsible as a mother.

I leaned over and grabbed my phone, dialing Dex’s number again but still getting the block. I was so frustrated and so scared that I couldn’t get my mind to work right. I could hear the rumbling of footsteps in the halls of the stairwells outside the hotel room. People were shouting, screaming even, and the muffled sounds of gunshots could be heard in the distance. With every bang my body jumped, holding Seth closer. I had never experienced anything like this before and I was completely beside myself. I was normally so brave, so level headed, but I had never been in a situation like this before. There were armed men all over the place, fighting for their freedom, fighting for their causes, while Seth and I hid from them, wishing we had never come to this country.

My thoughts turned to our penthouse in New York where it was safe and comfortable. It was insane to me that I was able to think of New York City as a safe place but compared to where we were, it seemed like Kansas. I wanted to be in our living room, watching Seth draw the buildings from the large windows, so high up we didn’t have to worry about anything. I wanted to hear Dex’s voice and feel his loving arms around me. I had never felt safer than when I was with him, but being in this situation alone was absolutely terrifying. Instead of being comforted and warm in our apartment, I was in a foreign country that decided to suddenly start a massive revolution. I was locked in an unfamiliar bathroom, in an unfamiliar place, where I barely understood the culture, much less knew how to fight through a major civil unrest. God, I hoped my mother wasn’t watching this from home, she would have a heart attack not knowing whether we were okay or not. The truth was, I didn’t even know if we were okay or not.

My thoughts shifted back to Dex and I wondered where he was at that moment. Dex had turned into my best friend and my partner, who would I turn to if Dex were gone? I had always been so courageous and independent but now, I was sitting here in a bathtub completely terrified and without any idea of what to do next. Where would I go if Dex was injured? How would I even find him? My breath increased and I felt like the walls were closing in around me. The noises outside began to ring loudly through my ears and I pressed my hands to my face, trying to calm down. I was having a panic attack and I needed to get it together. I set Seth down in the bathtub and climbed out, walking over to the sink and running the water. I splashed water onto my face to try to snap myself out of it. I grabbed the towel and blotted the water from my neck and cheeks. Slowly, I lifted my head and stared at myself in the mirror.

Get it together, Casey. With or without Dex, you have to figure out a way to survive this, for your son’s sake.

Chapter 27: Dex

The streets were flooded with protesters and it got so bad that the cars could no longer move through the crowd. The police tried to move them out of the street but every time they approached a brawl would ensue. In fact, I started to think we weren’t even safe inside the car anymore. I looked out the window at the droves of people holding their fists and signs in the air, chanting for their freedom and rights. I remembered watching protests like these on the television from home and thinking about how brave these people were for standing up for their rights. Now all I could think about was how dangerous they and the police had made it for everyone else in the city. Smoke bombs were going off all over the place and I could hear the faint rumble of gunshots in the distance. If it were this bad this far from the hotel, I could only imagine what it was like in the center of it all. Casey and Seth must be absolutely terrified being holed up in the hotel, hearing everything going on around them. I had to imagine them still in that room, I couldn’t even begin to think about anything bad happening to them.

I watched as Mateo leaned forward to the driver and whispered something in his ear before returning to the seat in front of me. He looked up and motioned to the seat belt so I reached over and quickly fastened it around me. The car took a quick left turn down the empty street and began to speed up. I looked at Mateo, confused as to where we were going.

“What’s going on? The hotel is in the other direction,” I said. “We have to get to them.”

“I know,” Mateo said with a serious tone. “The streets are completely blocked. The further we go the more violent it is going to get. The videos show that the protesters have pushed into the hotel and the cops are already engaging anyone on the streets. We will never get there if we keep going in that direction. We are going to the closest airfield, you can charter a helicopter from there. With any luck and your deep pockets, we can get to the top of the hotel faster than we could run down through that crowd.”

“What if they don’t have any helicopters? My pilot is stuck right now as everyone is fleeing the city,” I explained.

“This is a small carrier,” he explained. “It’s mostly used by militia and military. There should be plenty. And if not, we will go from there. Right now, this is our only choice.”

Maybe he was right, maybe going through that mess was the worst thing we could possibly do. If the other guards hadn’t even made it there yet, it would be hours before we could get to Casey. Hours in which anything could go wrong and hours that would pass while my wife and child sat terrified inside the suite, waiting for someone to help them. And what if something happened? What if they needed help and we didn’t try to get there any faster? I could never live with myself if I made the wrong decision and it cost me my family. That was something that I couldn’t even start to imagine, a fear so deep that my mind refused to let me think about it. So, seeing as Mateo had been through situations like this before and he knew the area, I decided that going along with whatever he thought was best was the right thing to do at that moment.

I nodded my head and looked out as we sped through the streets and out of the city. Right on the edge of the metropolis was a small airfield with older helicopters parked in the tall grasses. As we approached the gate, Mateo rolled down his window and nodded at the guard. The man with the large gun peered into the car and stared at me suspiciously. Mateo spoke to him quietly and they opened the gates for us. When we approached the small shack at the front, Mateo and I jumped out and hurried inside. He spoke to the man for me since I didn’t speak fluent Spanish, relaying my requests and offering to pay double when he seemed uneasy. As soon as the money was offered, he shook his head and yelled to the pilot in the background. We watched as he jogged out to the helicopter and began preparing it for flight. It was obvious that the owner had told him to make haste as he threw the contents of the chopper on the ground and readied it as fast as his hands could move. I handed over the cash to the owner and raced after Mateo, jumping in the chopper and buckling in. They pushed headphones on me so I could hear them talk and I held on tightly as the blades began to turn above us.

As the helicopter took to the air and moved into the city, I could see the droves of people moving toward the hotel. There were thousands of them carrying signs and protesting the political division within their worlds but all I could think about was Casey and Seth trapped in the top of the hotel. I had spent my entire life emboldened by the fact that I was a lone wolf, capable of any and everything on my own. My independence had been the most important aspect of my life but now, as I flew toward fate, I realized that independence meant nothing to me. I no longer felt like a lone wolf but instead like the alpha, protecting his family, keeping them close, and making sure they were safe. I wanted to have Casey and Seth by my side for the rest of my life where I could always ensure their safety. They were the only things in my life that I cared about anymore, even beyond the company and way beyond my independence. In all reality, this situation was the first time I had ever felt completely dependent on someone else to lead me in the right direction. I threw my boldness to the wind, as I didn’t want to make the wrong choice and have the consequences affect those dearest and closest to me.

We circled around the block and hovered over top of the hotel. I could see people spilling out onto the rooftop, waving their signs and tending to their injuries. The place was swarming with protesters running from t

he police and they had broken through the stairwell blockades that lead straight past the suites that Casey and Seth were in. My heart was beating heavily in my chest as we touched down, immediately jumping from the helicopter and making our way toward the door. I turned back to Mateo as he listened to his earpiece, nodding. He grabbed my arm and pulled me close, yelling loudly over the crowds and sound of the helicopter behind us.

“The other guys are on their way,” he yelled. “Let’s get to the suite and try to get them out.”

I nodded my head and pushed my way through the crowd of people and into the stairwell. The place was packed full of people, some injured, some hiding, but all in a chaotic state. I took a deep breath realizing that the only thing standing between me and my family were these people and though I felt for them and their plight, they were the enemy in my eyes. I pushed forward, breaking through the crowd, pushing people out of the way, and stopping for only a moment as I wrestled past those who wanted to heckle us. Mateo was behind me keeping the path clear as I shoved and pushed one step at a time. As I hit the landing where the door to the suites sat wide open, a man in a ski mask jumped in front of me. He squared up in front of the door not wanting to let me by. At that moment, Casey and Seth’s faces flashed through my mind and I ran forward plowing into the guy and rolling through the doorway. I stood up and reared back, punching him in the jaw and pushing him into Mateo.