“Where shall we check again?” He sounds frantic, finally this is getting to him as much as it is me. Much as it sucks because it only proves that we’ve gone another level lower, I’m glad not to be alone. “We need to go over your notes. If you’re still stuck on the business park then that’s where we need to be.” I give him a look. He was the one who didn’t want me to overreact. Now look at him. “Well, you might be right. It could be a cold trail. We have to do something, don’t we?” He rubs his hands over his eyes in anger. “We can’t let him win.”
I know why he’s freaking out, and to be honest I can’t blame him. One of the younger guys, Jones I think it was, got shot in the leg last week. He’s been in hospital ever since, it isn’t anything serious, but it’s a warning. There’s no evidence that it’s Kingpin, but we all know. The problem is it was supposed to be Andre on that mission, and now he’s scared. For himself and for his family as well. I can understand that well enough.
Every now and again, I want to tell him about me and Cici. He’s my closest work friend and he doesn’t even know that I have someone serious in my life. Much less that we’re about to have a baby. No one knows that I’m an upcoming father, that in about two months’ time I’ll have a baby in my life. I’ll be a dad. I’m keeping this massive secret from everyone in my life and it makes me feel like shit. But it’s the only way I can be one hundred percent safe and I can keep her out of the limelight. I mean, we go out in public every now and again, but nowhere I think anyone will see us… even the stalker doesn’t seem to have any images of her. I need to keep it away. Even if Andre isn’t to blame, and I still hate myself for even thinking about it, he might accidently blab. Someone in here might well have something to do with Kingpin and I don’t want to give them any ammo.
“Okay, so where do you want to go? There’s the old abandoned toy factory that we could comb over again…” I look down at my list, knowing that Andre needs something to focus on. He’s got that itchy feet feeling that I had once upon a time. I still have it, but I’m trying to be much less irrational about it now. “Or the laundry mat. That’s still going, there are a few employees there, but it might be worth looking at. We did all the other warehouses that are open so it might be worth a try.” I offer him a one shouldered shrug. “What do you think?”
“I don’t know, but I need to go out and look. Are you coming out with me or are you buried in paper work?”
There’s a familiar burning in his eyes. He needs to do this alone. It might not be protocol but things don’t always get done when following the rules. “I’m chained to my desk, but you can take a junior with you.”
“Hmm, yeah maybe.” He definitely isn’t going to. “I’ll keep in touch, okay?”
As he walks out, I feel bad. Even though this isn’t directly my fault
, all I’m doing is my job, because the target is on my head I don’t like the danger being portrayed to other people. I even feel bad about Jones, even if he is an idiot. But if I wasn’t Kingpin’s target, then I suppose it would just be someone else. This is him, not me.
I grab the evidence folder and scan my eyes through it. There’s a message, I’m sure. In the shooting of Jones, there’s something that we haven’t yet spotted. The officers took photographs of the entire scene and I can’t stop looking at them. I’ve called every car dealership in the area, trying to find out who owns the car in the background, I’ve tried to finger print all the things brought back into the office, I’ve made many endless calls to everyone around, but no one has anything. Again, the guy is spotless. There’s something, I just know it.
Wait! All of a sudden, I see something that catches my eye, something that could be it. A flyer linked to a pharmaceutical company just out of state with a phone number scribbled across it. Well, I assume it’s a phone number, it’s laid out that way. I just can’t see it because the image is blurry. I could just find the company information online and call them, but if these guys are into something bad then it’s unlikely the guy answering the phones will know about it. I’ll simply arise suspicion by letting them know that I’m onto them. No, I need to get this number to call the person directly, so I leap up and I race to the evidence room to find it there. I didn’t notice this the first time around because it’s so small and partially tucked under something else. Maybe I wouldn’t have spotted it at all if I hadn’t become so obsessed by the case, but I am. And I’m hoping that checking over every single detail will eventually lead me to something. This is probably it. It has to be.
I race through the station, ignoring people as they call out to me. My heart races hard against my rib cage while the excitement builds. It’s been a very long time since I’ve felt like I have something, which only confirms this is it. My instincts are running wild, they’re almost off the scale, I feel really urgent.
“Let me in,” I growl at the jobs worth sitting at his desk, guarding the evidence room. “I need something.”
“Well, what do you need?” The guy rises from his chair and places his hands determinedly on his hips. He must be new and he hasn’t crossed me yet. If he doesn’t fucking stop it, he’s going to find out. “I need to locate it on the files. I’m sure you’re aware that I can’t let you rummage through and make a mess.”
I grit my teeth, knowing that he’s right. The evidence room is arranged in a very strict way and for a good reason too. It has to be like that for when we need things. I suppose, much as it pains me, I have to respect him.
“It’s this.” I show him the photograph and wince and he squints to see it. “You must have it. It’s a flyer.”
He gives me a doubtful look. “I don’t know. I don’t recognize this. Are you sure it’s been pulled?”
I’m not, but I don’t have time to check through a fucking endless list of shit. Does this asshole know how busy I am? I don’t have time to waste looking at a computer screen. “Check it for me. I need it. It’s related to the Jones’ shooting, so it should be in among all that stuff.” I nod towards his computer. “I need it now.”
He takes forever and I’m sure it’s just to piss me off. He keeps narrowing his eyes and turning his lips downwards into a frown as if his whole purpose is to hold me up. I’m about to scream at him, to remind him of how important I am, but before I do that his eyes flick up and he gives me a sympathetic look.
“It isn’t here. You might need to speak to the guys who cleared the scene.” He must be able to sense the intense temper rising up in me because he immediately shrinks in on himself. “Or you could ask the tech guys to zoom in and clear the picture so they can get the information you need that way.”
Hmm, that isn’t the worst idea in the world, not that I’m going to share that compliment with this tool. Instead, I give him a withering glance and I spin on my heels to leave him. All I really need is the number. That might well be something the tech guys can do. I’ve seen them work miracles before, and this isn’t asking too much. I could do it myself if I had the time and effort to learn what systems they use…
“What’s going on?” I demand as I walk into the main office area. Something’s happened because it’s chaotic. And it doesn’t seem like it’s ‘someone’s birthday’ chaos. It’s bad. I wonder if it’s to do with the case. No one even turns to look at me as I walk in, my commanding tone does nothing. I grab onto the arm of the receptionist to ask her. “What’s going on here? What have I missed?”
Her eyes almost bug out of her head when she sees that it’s me asking. “It’s, erm…” Her eyes dart everywhere. She doesn’t want to tell me which only makes me much more anxious to know. “Andre.”
“Andre.” I must yell that because the whole room falls into silence. “What happened to Andre?”
I sent him off about an hour ago on a mission that he shouldn’t have done alone. I did tell him to take a junior with him but I know he didn’t. My blood runs ice cold as I look at all the eyes in the room, all on me piercing through my skin, darting painfully over my body and hurting me everywhere.
“He got shot… not far away from here actually,” she whispers. “A drive by shooting...”
“Where is he? What hospital is he in?” Rage bubbles and burns through my body, making my bones shatter and rattle painfully. I need to help, I must do something, I can’t stand it. I don’t understand why everyone here is just standing around doing nothing. “Why aren’t we on our way over there already? What’s happening?
I spin around waiting for someone to give me an answer but one by one their eyes all fall downwards which squeezes the air out of my lungs. Bit by bit I realize what’s going on here and it leaves me utterly breathless. It physically hurts my body all over. My heart dies, my kidneys shrivel up, my stomach falls out my ass.
Andre… no. I clutch onto my forehead as I think about his family, his life, him. He’s a great officer, he’s an awesome guy, he didn’t deserve any of this… and it’s all my fault. It’s just to get to me. Andre has died because of me. If I’d solved this quicker, if I’d reacted more, none of this would have happened. If only… if only…
All of a sudden, the room pinholes and I feel the intense sensation that I’m falling out of control and I can’t stop myself. The room turns to black, I can barely see any faces, everything is fading away into black. Everything inside of me switches off completely, leaving me nothing but mush.