“A week?” I asked, impressed. “That has to be some kind of record for you.”
“I know, right?” she said with blushing cheeks. “We just have so much fun together. I feel like I can be myself and he doesn’t judge me. I really hope I can keep this one around.”
“I do too, because the last time I saw you blush like that, you were tripping down the main staircase of the high school our freshman year,” I said, laughing.
“Oh God,” she said, rolling her eyes. “That was terrible. But yeah, I really like this guy. How about you? How are you and Blaine?”
“Um, beyond good,” I gushed. “Like he calls or texts every single day, we see each other all the time, and I can actually be myself around him. I mean, we talked for three hours last night about comic books. He is just as awkward and weird as me. He just does a really good job hiding it because he has lived in the corporate world for so long.”
“Do you think that awkwardness would be just as charming if you had never slept with him?”
“What?” I asked, laughing. “I mean, of course it would be. That’s a weird question.”
“No, it’s not, not really,” she said. “He is your first, and every girl gets attached to their first. It’s like some weird biological thing that happens. The man you lose your virginity to becomes like almost an obsession. I still think about my first to this day.”
“I mean, I can understand why,” I said. “You give up something very private to you. But I know that isn’t the reason I am so smitten with Blaine. He is just like me, only way richer and way better looking. His brain works a different way than most people’s, and even though I can’t say I fully understand it myself, I have never been able to relate to someone like this before.”
“Okay,” Leena said. “I just wanted to make sure that wasn’t the only reason. I don’t want you to be disappointed because we tend to build these men up in our minds, and when they don’t meet our expectations, it almost destroys us.”
“I understand,” I said with a sigh. “Just know that I don’t have any real expectations for him. Not yet, at least. Right now, we are just happy to be together and to find time in our busy schedules to do things we like.”
“Like Superhero movie marathons,” Leena said, giggling. “Well, I’m glad it’s him doing it and not me getting dragged into it all. Though I did like the Iron Man movies. They were pretty cool.”
“You disappoint me with your mainstream Superhero knowledge,” I said, laughing and shaking my head. “Everyone liked Iron Man.”
“All right, nerd.” Leena laughed. “I’m going to let all the dogs into the yard so I can clean their pens.
“Sounds good,” I said, looking down at the mounds of paperwork still sitting on the desk.
I didn’t know how to fully explain the dynamic that Blaine and I were starting to develop. Sure, my feelings grew stronger for him when we had sex, but shouldn’t they? Wasn’t it natural for two people to feel closer and more connected when they added physical intimacy to their relationship? I knew my feelings weren’t based around him being my first. They were based around the fact that he was extremely good to me. He had gone out of his way to find me, treated me like a princess on all of our dates, waited patiently for me until I was ready for sex, and then had made sure to be gentle and caring when I lost my virginity.
Sure, at first my growing feelings were based on the chemistry between us, but that was how almost every relationship started out. Most people didn’t start dating someone that they couldn’t hold a conversation with or that they weren’t attracted to in some way or another. It was initial chemistry, that spark that drew you to one another, that started any kind of connection. What you did with that chemistry right off the bat was what determined whether you were going to fuel that chemistry for one night and then let it burn out, or slowly add to the flames of passion until the spark between you was a roaring fire that just kind of took care of itself. With Blaine, it was a fire, and a very familiar one at that.
I pushed the thoughts to the side, knowing I needed to focus on this paperwork if I was going to be able to have my weekend free to hang out with Blaine. I sat down and took a deep breath, my mind wandering back and forth between him and the task at hand. My phone buzzed, and I looked down, finding a text from Blaine. He had sent a picture of Superman through to my phone, and I laughed, shaking my head. We had a whole conversation about who was better, Superman or Batman. He took Superman’s side while I took Batman’s. I found a picture of Batman and sent it back to him, reminding him of Superman’s fate later in the series. He sent me a sad face, and it made me laugh out loud.
After that, I got to work, having even more motivation at that point to get through all the work of the day. It was really close to busy season, and I knew that if I didn’t stay on top of things, I was going to end up working seven days a week like last year. Last year, that didn’t bother me so much, but this year, I had other things, or should I say other people, to spend my time on. I didn’t want to be held up in the office all holiday season, missing out on some really cool things Blaine and I could do together. Things I hadn’t had anyone to do with me, pretty much ever in my life.
Around noon, Leena walked through the office and to the front door, taking food from whatever takeout delivery guy she called. She whistled at me and waved the bag in the air, smiling. I was starving, so I put down my paperwork, actually pretty impressed at how much I had gotten done, and joined her in the lobby of the place to eat. It was apparently Chinese Friday, one of the many days we labeled since we were obsessed with food. I sat back in the chair with my plate of rice and Moo Goo Gai Pan and filled my belly, my thoughts drifting back to Blaine.
“I want to say something,” I said. “I want to tell you that I do have really strong feelings for this guy, and they did increase when we slept together. But when I think about why I have these feelings, a million things run through my mind.”
“Good,” Leena said, leaning forward. “I wasn’t trying to downplay your feelings for him. I just wanted to make sure that they weren’t misplaced. I had misplaced feelings once, and it was awful, but after standing back and looking at everything, I realized that I never really cared for the guy in the first place. I just got caught up in the glitz and glamour of it all.”
“I understand,” I said, shaking my head. “But I can assure you, there isn’t a starry-eyed, love-sick girl here. Just someone who is excited to have found a person that can be a friend, lover, and partner. Not just someone I have fun with but know they are going to break my heart.”
“Good,” she said, smiling. “Then it’s settled, and I’m happy for you.”
“Thank you,” I said, laughing.
As I sat there eating my lunch, I turned my attention to the trees blowing wildly out the window. Blaine was an amazing man who had opened himself up to me in a way that no one else had ever done. He showed me his vulnerability, and I showed him mine. Sure, it was really early in the relationship, and we were focused on fun and excitement together, but at the same time, he was really careful with me. How could I not care for a guy like him? With so much in common and the way we were together, I found it almost impossible to think that I couldn’t actually care for him.
I had seen those girls before, though, the ones that latched themselves onto a man because he made them feel special, or he did things for them that t
hey couldn’t do for themselves. I wasn’t that girl, nor did I want to become that girl at all. I truly cared about Blaine, and I was excited to be starting this relationship with him. It was a life I had wanted for a long time, but I’d refused to settle until I found the right guy. I was definitely starting to think that Blaine was the right guy.
Either way, I was invested in whatever this was, and I wasn’t going to let my head get in the way this time. Blaine and I were a good match, and I couldn’t wait to see him on Saturday night.
Chapter 15