“It’s only four,” Justin protested. “Where the hell are you going?”
I forced myself to smile. Looking into his sapphire eyes made all of the passion from the night before come rushing back in a painful torrent of memories, but I couldn’t let him know that I was suffering.
“I’m leaving,” I said with a tight smile. “That’s all you need to know.”
An hour later, I was leaning on Susan’s shoulder, trying not to cry into my cocktail. We were at our usual bar for happy hour – thankfully, it was crowded like usual – and I couldn’t relax.
“I have to tell you something,” I said with a sip of my drink. It was only my second, but the alcohol was starting to work its magic and I felt looser and happier than I had almost all day.
“Sure,” Susan said. “What’s up?”
I swallowed hard. “I lost my virginity,” I said.
“Oh my god, last night?”
I nodded.
“To whom?”
I bit my lip and glanced down into my mojito. “With Justin Long,” I said quietly.
“What?” Susan’s loud cry scalded my ears and I frowned, wincing as a sharp pain shot through my head. “Sorry,” she said quickly, leaning forward and grabbing one of my hands. “Girl, what the hell happened?”
“You know how it was raining last night?” I asked miserably. Susan nodded and I took a long swallow of my drink. My throat burned from the tequila but I didn’t care – at least something was helping.
“Yeah, but it wasn’t raining men,” Susan said. “How the hell did you meet up with him? Did you go back to work?”
I shook my head. Blonde curls spun into my peripheral vision and for a moment, I had a horrible feeling that I was going to pass out.
“No,” I said. “I left here – I was running towards the subway station. And as soon as I got to the corner, he pulled up in a limo and told me to get in.”
“Oh my god, Hannah, you didn’t,” Susan gasped. She covered her mouth with one hand and looked at me, truly scandalized. I felt a slight touch of pride – now that our positions were reversed, I almost enjoyed telling the heartbreaking tale of how I’d lost my virginity.
“I did,” I said with a touch of smugness. “I had to. I didn’t really have a choice. I was soaking wet, and it’s not like I have health insurance right now. I can’t really afford to get sick.”
“Well, shit,” Susan said. “Shouldn’t have done that, should you?”
I sighed. “I don’t know what happened. He gave me champagne and he was so charming – it was like a total one-eighty from his behavior at work. I couldn’t believe it, he was like a totally different person.”
Susan snorted. “Men always are when they think there’s a chance of getting laid because of it.”
That stung. “Ouch,” I said.
“Sorry.”
“Anyway, his limo driver took me home. Justin leaned in to kiss me, and then we stopped. I was so crazy – being with him and talking was really making me think he was different. So, I invited him up.”
“Damn,” Susan said. “Handled like a pro.”
“Except today he completely ignored me,” I said. “He basically told me not to talk to him.” I glanced down into my drink. “I feel like such a loser, Susan. It’s so incredibly obvious that he only wanted me for sex!”
“Maybe he’s worried about getting in trouble with his father,” Susan suggested. “You did mention that he’s on a tight leash.”
“Well that didn’t stop him yesterday.” I made a sour face, then poured the rest of my drink down my throat. “If he really wanted to behave, he never would have kissed me. Much less asked me for a ride in his limo and then basically seduced my pants right off.”
Susan sighed. “Well, I’ve had times like that, too,” she said slowly. “Maybe it’s better it happened now and you’re used to it.”
I sighed. “ I guess,” I mumbled.