I get a parking space near the entrance of the hospital and Ace does as well. We sprint to the glass doors and rush in. At the reception, I’m directed to the pediatric ward on the second floor, and rather than wait for the elevator, Ace and I take the stairs, two at a time.
I give my name at the reception on the second floor, and we’re directed to Emma’s room. It’s down a wide hallway and I sprint there with Ace right behind me. I burst into the room and Valerie and Morris look up from where they are hunched over the bed. Their faces are pinched with the same fear and worry that I feel.
"How is she?" I ask them moving to the side of the bed. Emma looks so tiny lying on the bed with an IV drip going into her arm.
Seeing her like that makes me want to pick her and cradle her.
"The fever is going down," Valerie says. "It's not as high as it was when we came in. They said she has an infection, but she'll be okay."
Relief floods me that it's an infection and not another sinister reason. She looks so peaceful lying on the bed and tears unexpectedly fill my eyes. I can't remember the last time I was as emotional as I am right now. I reach out and caress her little arm. She's so innocent and sweet. I wish her mother had met her. Sadness comes over me as thoughts of Jade fill my mind. No baby should leave a hospital without a mother.
"My name is Ace, I'm Logan's friend and colleague," Ace says and steps forward to shake Morris' hand and then Valerie's. I forgot that he was with me.
"It's a pleasure to meet you," Morris says. "We're grateful to you boys for the work you do, putting your lives at stake to help people."
I shoot Morris a grateful smile. It's always nice to hear from the public that they appreciate the work we do and acknowledge that it's a dangerous job.
"It's an honor and a privilege to serve," Ace says and gives a slight bow. "Your granddaughter will be just fine."
A proud smile comes over Morris's smile. "She will. She's a little fighter."
The doctor comes around and Valerie introduces me as Emma's dad.
"We're giving her antibiotics intravenously and she'll be fine come morning. She'll be ready to go home tomorrow," he says. He gives us more information, talking directly to me, as Emma's dad. For the first time, I feel the weight of responsibility of a parent. Even though Valerie and Morris are Emma's caregivers, her overall health responsibility is mine. The thought sobers me up and for the first time, I consider the possibility of bringing Emma home.
Ace and I leave soon after and Emma's grandparents and I agree to meet at the hospital the following morning.
"Do you want to go for a beer?" Ace says. "You look like you could use one."
I rake my fingers through my hair. "Yeah, a beer would be nice."
We agree on our usual place, a bar close to the fire station, owned by two retired firefighters. I follow Ace and while I drive, I ponder the idea of having Emma home in the near future.
The thought doesn't terrify me as it once did. I have Vanessa to thank for that. She let me help her with taking care of Ivy which has taught me a lot about babies. What babies need is a lot of is love. Vanessa says that so many times, I feel as if it's etched into my brain. I can easily shower Emma with love.
Chapter 16
Vanessa
I can’t believe I’d entertained thoughts of moving in permanently with Logan. In the last couple of weeks, he’s made me think that maybe what we have is serious. I’m a fool. Tears blind me as I ferry the last of our stuff back to the cottage.
The conversation with the woman who called earlier plays in my mind again. She had been slightly hysterical and sure that I knew who Emma was. I’m still stunned that Logan has a baby daughter. A baby daughter who he never thought to mention even as we took care of my daughter together. The woman sounded surprised that I didn’t know who Emma was. She sounded older and she left me with more questions than answers. Who is Emma’s mother? How long was she with Logan and are they still together?
Logan has told me nothing about his life and I’ve been so caught up in this fantasy of us as a family that I haven’t asked him about himself.
A man who is interested in you though doesn’t need to be asked. He volunteers that information. There’s only one reason why Logan didn’t tell me. He doesn’t care about me in that way. It’s purely physical between us. I allowed myself to get carried away, as I often do. Lexi warned me but I thought I knew Logan better.