Promise Me
Page 43
“I don’t know. I just know what I want and don’t want.”
“And what is that?” I asked. I sounded husky, breathy and shit did I want this man again. I wanted him to remember how great the sex was between us. Dirty, hard and loving. He was all three at once.
“I want a life with our child, like our siblings have,” he said softly. His voice husky. “This baby happened for a reason. I wish I remembered that night, Skylar. What I don’t want, is for Luke to ever feel like Dom and his siblings feel. Unwanted. Unloved. I want him. I want to build a happy family for the three of us.”
I nodded. Then I caressed his face. So rough beneath my fingertips. “Let’s lie down Ronan. I’m tired.”
Ronan lifted me in his arms and stood. I wrapped my arms and legs around him reminding me again of that night. Although less passionate, this was more sweet and tender. His hands were holding me carefully. He pulled the blankets back and laid me down. Then he slid in behind me. His arms encircled my body holding me close. Ronan pulled the blankets over us.
“Tell me about Dom,” I said to him. My back was against his front. He tucked his head around mine and whispered to me.
“I want to help him. His mom is a drug addict. He’s raising the two younger kids.”
I nodded. “I like Maddie. Nickolas is something else.”
He was quiet for a moment. “I think he’s scared.” He hesitated for a moment. “You might be teaching him freshman English.”
I turned my head so I could see him. “Scared?”
“Getting close to people,” Ronan clarified.
“What can I do?”
“They go to practice with him. Games. What do you think?”
I was quiet then. “What does their mother do?”
“I don’t know. Their grandparents live in Florida and send money for their care. They don’t want them either.” I was rubbing my feet against Ronan’s hair covered legs. He kissed my temple and held me closer.
“So can I pick up Maddie and Nickolas on Monday and bring them to the farm? Would Dom let me? That is a long day for them to sit in the sun while he practices.”
Ronan turned his head into my neck then and kissed me. His whiskers tickled and I giggled. “All we can do is ask. Thank you Skylar.”
“You’re welcome.”
I was getting sleepy. My eyes were having a hard time staying open. His breath was warm on my neck making it that much harder for me to stay awake. “Skylar, will you marry me?” My eyes popped wide open.
“What? When did you have in mind?”
He sighed against me. “As dumb as this sounds I don’t even know when Luke is due.”
“December fifteenth,” I told him.
School was starting soon. One more week, then we would both be teaching. Ronan was going to teach history until at least winter break. He was also going to be coaching with Coach Gatlin every night and every Friday night he would be at the football games. On weekends he promised to help Fionn. He didn’t want that to change. I enjoyed spending time here with Gramps and Aine while he worked with Fionn.
“What are you thinking Ronan? You became very quiet.”
“I think we should get married next week before school starts.”
I laid my hands over his. “Are you sure Ronan?” I asked.
“I am.” He helped me turn over so that I was facing him. “We have a lot to build on. More than most couples.” His beautiful eyes were searching my face, making it hard to look away. “I’ll take good care of you Skylar. I’ll take good care of Luke too. I just want to be a good husband and father. I feel like this is what I was meant to do.”
I laid my head on his chest. He began to talk about the hospital. Dying. Twice. Feeling like he was actually hearing Liam speak to him. The panic in his brother’s voice. The pain that he was causing his family causing him such distress now. I could hear the heartbreak in his voice. I raised my head and looked at Ronan. There were tears in his eyes.
“When I actually died,” he stopped for a moment to collect himself. “I saw the whole bright light thing. I followed it and saw my grandparents. Joy, Luke, Betsy and Joey. I knew it was Joey immediately because he looks like Chance.”
I laid my chin on my hand and listened to him. He needed to tell me about this without judging him.