Marriage For One

Then when he suddenly stopped, I could’ve cried. I wasn’t sure if it was from relief or sorrow. Thankfully, he didn’t pull back completely, and I only swayed toward him a little. I forced myself to open my eyes.

“Am I doing okay?” he asked against my already swollen lips, his eyes staring straight into mine. The hairs on my arms stood up and his eyes became my entire focus. They looked darker, deeper, and deep ocean blue became my absolute favorite new color.

I cleared my throat and tried to move my head up and down in a nod. “I mean, it depends on what you’re going for, but much better, er, than a turtle…I think.”

“You think so?” His gravelly voice caused my eyelids to droop, and the way he used his left hand to swipe some of my bangs out of my face, the backs of his fingers gently grazing my temple…

Biting on my lip so I wouldn’t do something stupid, I took a deep breath, nodded, and forced my eyes to open. In the same second, he was on my lips again. As slow and sweet as it had started with his first kiss, with this one, the more his tongue swirled in my mouth, the more he tilted his head and tried to get in deeper, the further I slipped into a dark hole I never wanted to come out of. His hand at my back pulled me forward, a barely noticeable inch or two, but it made it impossible for me not to arch my back and help him along. I wasn’t into public displays of affection at all, but I forgot about every single person that was in that huge ballroom with us. I could’ve been standing in the middle of a stadium in Jack’s arms going at it full force and probably still wouldn’t have cared in that moment.

It was a little rough, our kiss, and somehow I think I knew it’d be like that with him. Rough and demanding and consuming. Knew it even before this madness had started.

When my tongue got its own idea and started to get more into it, I rose up on my toes, basically climbing him with my arms to get more of him, this prickly and rough-around-the-edges man who was apparently mine in public for the better part of the next two years. Leaning in harder to get more, his hand slipped from my cheek to cradle my neck. I felt his other arm go around my waist, bringing me flush with his chest. Maybe he wasn’t that good at communicating with me, but he sure was good at this.

Something I couldn’t exactly identify was rising up to the surface inside of me, and to be honest, more than happy to be that close, I wrapped my own arms around his neck and a groan slipped from my lips. That was when he suddenly stopped and pulled back. He wasn’t as out of breath as I was, but he was definitely breathing hard. Flushed, I just stared up at him in wonder. What the hell had just happened? Was he trying for an Oscar or something? Had he felt whatever I had felt there for a second? A minute? Or had it been an hour?

I quietly cleared my throat and dropped my arms, fixing my dress under his stare. Turning my head slightly to the right, I wiped my mouth with my fingers because I didn’t think it was a good idea to keep licking my lips trying to taste him again.

Facing him, I started, “Jack, I—”

“Your ex-fiancé is staring,” he said in a calm voice. His breathing didn’t appear to be labored anymore, so opposite of what I was feeling.

I stiffened but didn’t look back to where I knew Jack had just glanced or had probably kept glancing while he was kissing me. So, this was just a show. My stomach dropped and I let go of what I had been about to say. His kiss had been just a show. I mean…of course it was a show. I already knew that—he had given me a warning, for Christ’s sake. It wasn’t like he had smiled at me and then lost control and kissed me because he just couldn’t stop himself. Nope. He had given me plenty of warning, but…but for a second there, I had lost myself in the kiss and had forgotten. For a second there, I had thought he was actually, maybe… It had probably just been a fluke. I shook my head, trying to get rid of the haze clouding my brain and return to reality. Jack was a good kisser—so what? Maybe I could simply wait for the next public event when he thought we should lock lips again, just enjoy it for what it was, and not think too much about it.