Marriage For One

“And I listened to you,” I agreed easily. “I wore my coat, my scarf, my gloves, my beret. I wore everything I could wear.”

“Nice try,” he countered, shaking his head. “It’s freezing out there—you’re gonna get sick.”

“I won’t. It’s all cozy and warm and perfect in here.”

A kid who barely looked sixteen dropped off our menus, cutting into our conversation. I dropped my elbows from the table and started checking out the options. The kid next to us was chattering away and making his grandpa laugh, and it just lifted my mood even more. I looked up from the menu and around the restaurant, noticing the other few customers, and I realized we were extremely overdressed.

I leaned in toward Jack, and he looked at me quizzically. “Come here,” I whispered.

“Why?”

He looked so suspicious and adorable in a grumpy way that I had to laugh. “Just lean in closer.”

He did so carefully.

“I think we’re a bit overdressed.”

His shoulders relaxed before he looked around, and I had to bite my lip to hold in my laughter. Did he think I’d jump on him?

“I like it though,” I continued before he had a chance to say anything, and his eyes came back to me. “I feel special. I know this isn’t your usual type of place at all, so I appreciate that you’re doing this for me even more. Thank you.”

“You don’t have to thank me, Rose. It’s as much for me as it is for you, and it’s just dinner. It doesn’t matter where we are as long as we’re together.”

“Ah, you just killed me, and that’s true. That’s really true.”

“I’m still glad you approve.”

“Yes, you did well. You might get lucky. Eventually.”

Another head shake as he put his menu down. “You don’t give up, do you?”

I groaned and hid my face behind my hands. “It’s not me, I promise. It’s the doctor.”

“What do you mean it’s the doctor?” He reached out and pulled my hands down as if he couldn’t not have eyes on my face—at least that was what I liked to think.

“I do want you, I’m not gonna lie about that, but I’m not like this. I’m never like this. This is only happening because he said…” Looking at the grandpa and grandson next to me, I whispered, “It’s because he said I can’t have sex. Now I want all the sex. You can’t tell me I can’t do something. Then all I wanna do is…well, it. It’s the allure of the forbidden. You’re not like that?”

“You either want something or you don’t. What does what other people say have anything to do with it?”

I leaned back. “Of course you’d say that.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

I waved my hand in the air. “You’re…you. You’re very disciplined. I don’t think anyone or anything can affect you. Like you love to say, you can control yourself.”

“You affect me.”

I smiled. It was a slow and happy one. “You affect me too.”

“So, correct me if I’m wrong: if the doctor had said it’s okay to have sex, you—”

“Jack!” I snapped, reaching across to put my hand over his mouth.

“What?” he muttered.

Tilting my head to the side, I gestured to the duo sitting next to us with my eyes.

Jack looked up and sighed. I supposed it was his version of asking for deliverance.

“Just skip the word, but keep going,” I prompted as I sat back down.

“If he had said it was okay to…do it, you wouldn’t be asking me to do it every day?”

“Well, I imagine I’d still want you, but I’m not sure I’d say it out loud, and definitely not this much. Two months after the surgery…well, since then I’m extremely…whatever.” Feeling my face flush, I pressed the back of my hand to my cheek.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, just a little hot in here.”

“Finish your sentence.”

We locked eyes and I managed to hold his intense gaze for a whopping ten seconds.

“Horny,” I said, my voice frustrated and maybe a little louder than I was anticipating. “Horny,” I repeated, more to myself this time.

The hostess, the girl who had walked us to our table, came back. “Hi. Welcome again. What can I get you folks?”

Jack and I were still staring at each other, and I didn’t want to be the first one to break eye contact. It was him doing stuff like this that was making me fall for him more and more. His intense gaze managed to touch all sorts of places, and when he was looking at me like that, I lost my mind a little.

“Hi,” I said brightly, and Jack finally moved his gaze to the girl. I sighed in relief and slumped in my seat. I’d just told him I was horny. Nice choice of word, for sure.

“You want to share a pizza or are you going with pasta?”

I quickly returned back to the world. “Pizza.”