I burst out laughing. And this was why I needed coffee.
"Get your head out of your ass, Linc," I growled to myself as I braked, cut the engine, and hopped out of my truck, two coffees in hand. "You're early," I blurted to my new assistant.
Dani was standing outside my building, and her phone was held to her ear. Her lips were moving — fast.
What the hell?
What type of person faked a sickness like that? Rage boiled inside me as I stomped over to her, ready to grab the phone out of her hands and toss it into the air, feeling a bit self-righteous, because how could someone be so selfish? I mean, her poor family! And she could actually talk?
"I miss you." Her low voice was barely above a whisper making it hard to hear what her voice actually sounded like. "I start a new job today." She paused. "It's Jaymeson's fault." She twirled her blonde hair around her thumb. "I love you so much. I'm so sorry."
"Well…" I cleared my throat, not caring that I was intruding on her private conversation. "… what are you? The girl that calls wolf?"
Slowly, Dani raised her eyes and met my gaze. The harsh glare of the morning sun revealed her face was white as the proverbial sheet. Her mouth opened, a small squeak emerged, and her lower lip trembled.
"Oh, please," I sneered. "I heard you talking, so drop the act, Dani. God knows I'm not the type to go tattle to your sister and brother-in-law. It's not my business that you like to lie to family."
With a hoarse cry, she smacked me in the chest. I backed up as some of the coffee spilled out of the cups.
She tugged the phone from her ear and started typing.
My phone buzzed.
I rolled my eyes. "Hands are kind of full, darling. Why don't you just use your words?"
She shook her head and pointed to my front pocket.
"Let's try this again." I could feel my irritation growing. "Tell me what it is you want to say. Like an adult."
She stomped her foot.
"Oh, great." I huffed out a breath "I lose a clepto assistant only to gain an angry teenager who thinks the only way she can get attention is to act out, pretend she actually has a disease that effects REAL people, and stomps to get attention. Tell me I'm not off base."
Tears filled the corners of her eyes.
"Wow." I sighed heavily, too tired to put up with her bullshit. "Ever think of going into acting? You're probably better than your sister, and she's the best I've seen in ages."
Tears spilled onto her cheeks. She just kept furiously pointing at my phone.
I stared her down. "Sorry, sweetheart. Your family may enable you, but I'm not going to. In fact, as of right now, consider yourself fired. I don't need drama in my life. I get enough of it as it is."
She let out a little cry and grabbed my arm.
"Let go," I said in a chilled voice.
Dani shook her head then held up her phone, the screen pointed in my direction. It was the text she'd sent me.
Dani: The only person I can talk to is my dad. I listen to his last voice message every morning, and when he's finished, I talk back.
"Well… shit," I muttered dropping my gaze to the ground, where her knees damn near knocked together, they were trembling so bad.
I raised my head.
Her chest heaved, cheeks stained with red.
Slowly, she typed back into her phone.
Dani: You're a jackass.
"Shit," I said again, lifting both coffees into the air in frustration. "I know. Look, I'm sorry, I saw you talking, heard you talking, and just assumed the worst. I didn't know."
She held up her phone again.
Dani: Now you do.
She snagged one of the coffees, jutted out her chin, and marched away from me. Feeling like one of the biggest pricks in the world, I called after her, and, when she didn't stop, let out a curse.
"Wait!" I set my coffee down on the sidewalk, raced after Dani, and grabbed her. "Look, I said I'm sorry. I just assumed. Can't we start over?"
She jerked away from me and shook her head no.
"Dani…" Shit, I really needed an assistant, Jaymeson wasn't joking when he said my life was chaotic. I'd had an assistant since my first commercial. Not having a right-hand person was like not having my phone, or walking around naked on set, extremely uncomfortable and unnecessary. "… wait, I need you."
She kept walking.
"Don't make me call Jaymeson!" Low blow. I knew it, but I was desperate.
She froze, her shoulders tensing.
"I'll do it." I held up my phone. "You don't want to let him down, do you?"
Her fists clenched at her sides, and she glanced back at me out of the corner of her eyes, nostrils flaring.
"I'm sorry," I repeated, only slightly distracted by the way her chest rose and fell. Minor, minor, minor. "I need help. Can't we just call it our first fight and move on?"
She threw her hands up in the air then pulled out her phone.
Dani: How much are you paying me?
"Clearly not enough since you have to put up with me yelling at you," I joked.
She didn't laugh. Well, at least I'd tried.
Dani: I want double what Jaymeson asked.
"Wow, tough bargain."
She turned around and crossed her arms.
"Deal," I croaked. I could afford it, but the girl seriously had no idea how much she was already getting paid. She was now officially one of the highest paid assistants in history — or at least it was going to feel like it. "So I'll just deposit that fifteen grand at the end of every month then?"