“I thought I told you not to speak or look up,” he growls, and his upper lip curls in, baring his teeth. “I guess you want to experience firsthand how that cat-o-nine tails works after all.” He’s reaches under my arms and effortlessly lifts my body up off the floor, and I think he’s actually going to follow through with his threat.
Pure, raw terror races through me, my heart beating wildly as I fight to catch a breath. I shake my head profusely, trembling in fear as a cold sweat starts to prickle at the back of my neck. “No, sir. Please, no, sir. I’ll behave.” I avert my eyes downward, praying he gives me this one last chance. The man is a monster; I don’t recognize him any longer. Of course, Jared said he would play me to get what he wanted, and like Travis said—playtime is over.
He backs me up against the curtained wall, and I feel the soft, velvety fabric of the red curtains brushing against my arms and legs, taunting me as I thank God Travis has kept them drawn shut. Travis presses my body into the outline of the cross as it hides behind the closed curtains, and forces my body against its hard shape. I tremble and shake, but I pray for mercy. Keeping my head bowed down, I don’t look at him or dare utter another word.
“Don’t test me again,” he grinds out through gritted teeth.
His heart isn’t made of stone; no, it’s made of something much harder than that. What’s harder than stone? I’m not sure, but it doesn’t matter because either way, his heart has been mortared ten layers thick, and I know I’ll never be able to break through it. I whisper toward the floor, “Yes, sir.”
Did he just come in here for a showdown and to throw his weight around? What was the purpose, other than to finish ripping my heart into tiny shreds of confetti? I keep my gaze on the floor, tasting the metallic tang from my lower lip. My sight on the floor is getting fuzzy from unshed tears, but I refuse to cry, because if I do, I will fall flat at his feet and sob, begging him to stop this. Then I will really be the fool.
“I expect total submission from this second forward. No more leeway.”
“Yes, sir,” I shakily reply.
“There is a party of sorts in two days. You will have a gown delivered, and someone will be by to do your hair and makeup around four. You will comply, and you will not discredit our reputation with your outbursts. If I hear that you do, I will beat Nick to the punch and have you gone before you can say, ‘sweet mother of Moses’.” My breath halts.
I feel his grip begin to loosen on me. “Remember, it’s just you and Nick from here on out.” His gruff and sobering words echo throughout the inner walls of my head.
With my eyes downcast, I watch through the veil of blonde strands covering my face as his black, shiny shoes begin a retreat, backing away from me. Nerves swirl in the pit of my stomach, making me feel queasy as he’s leaving me with new thoughts to digest. When my brain begins processing this information, all of his remarks bounce around in my head like ping pong balls in a bingo machine. Suddenly, my legs feel weak and shaky, and I realize just how much he’s rattled my nerves, but I hold steady.
I hear the door open, then I hear a ringing silence once the door clicks shut to my room. I really want to run to my bed, curl up on it, and cry a torrential downpour of tears, but I can’t give any of them the satisfaction of seeing my impending breakdown. I make my way to the bathroom on shaky legs while I can still see through my swimming eyes, and I watch my hand as it shakily reaches out for the spigot, turning on the shower water to scorching hot. I let the bathroom fill with heavy steam to cover the cameras. They will not see me cry.
Moving the shower curtain aside, I step over the threshold of the tub and into the stream. The scalding water immediately takes my breath away. I brace myself inside the tub, refusing to reduce the temperature. It feels as if a million tiny, hot, piercing pricks of acupuncture needles are breaking the surface of my skin. Pain. Pain is good. Pain averts my thoughts away from the mixed-up Hell I’m currently living in. I don’t know how much more I can mentally withstand. My sanity is hanging on by a mere thread.
I can see now why my father always insisted on bodyguards. I had no idea this type of danger even existed, especially for someone as simple as me. I had no clue my father had unseen enemies. If I would’ve known then what I know now, I would have taken extra steps of precaution. If I could go back in time, I would have done everything my father asked of me without complaint. I would have flown in private jets. I would have let him hire the extra bodyguards he wanted to. These are the times I wish I wasn’t so hardheaded. My defiance has definitely come back to bite me on the ass.