“I’m sorry, Ivy. I can’t make you feel good.” He said, running his fingers through his shaggy blonde hair.
“What are you talking about, Leon?” She asked him, biting down on her lip.
“I can’t make you feel good. I can’t make you happy.” He muttered, looking about the room like he wasn’t sure where he was.
“Leon, is this about your past? What’s the matter?” She cried, jumping off the bed and rushing towards him.
Leon stepped back, his back hitting the closed door of the room. Ivy placed her hands on his chest, in an attempt to calm him, but he glared at her, like he wanted to run away.
“I can’t make women happy. You are too lovely, you’re too beautiful and smart to want me. I will only end up hurting you.” He said, in a low guttural voice.
Ivy shook her head, still biting her lip.
“Who told you that? What are
you talking about?” She barked at him, clutching the front of his shirt with her hands.
“The woman I wanted to marry.” He said, finally meeting her eyes. Ivy’s hands dropped from his chest.
“You’re in love with someone else?” She asked, stepping away from him.
Leon remained silent, and averted his gaze from her again.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t know you were in love with somebody else.” Ivy said, the tears returning now. She knew she should have stayed away from him. She knew he wasn’t the man for her.
“Ivy, look…” He began to say but she interrupted him.
“I understand now, Leon. You can’t change what the heart wants. I was foolish to throw myself at you.” She said harshly, angrier with herself than anything else.
“No, you’re not…” He tried to say, but she had stopped him again.
“You don’t have to worry about me anymore, Leon. I won’t be making a fool of myself again. I’m going away.” She said, clasping her hands to the front. He jerked his head up to look at her.
“No, you don’t have to. I’ll tell your daddy you can work here as long as you want. I was being selfish. You need a job, and I need an employee.” He said, meeting her eyes.
Ivy shook her head.
“No, I have another job. I’m going away. I’ll leave town soon. You don’t have to worry. You can hire somebody else, someone who won’t tempt you and seduce you and trouble you.” She said and whipped around from him.
“You’re leaving town?” She heard him ask from behind her.
“Yes.” She replied, hoping that he would ask her where. Hoping that there was still some hope, that he might still want her.
“I’ll leave a sandwich for you on the kitchen counter, in case you get hungry later.” He said, after a few moments of silence. And then he was gone, he had left her room and gently shut the door behind him.
Ivy fell back down on the bed, drawing the covers up close to her chin. She had never felt this miserable before, and all for a man who was in love with somebody else.
Ivy didn’t get out of bed the next day till mid-day. Even then, she showered slowly, changed into a pair of old loose jeans and a fresh blouse, not in any hurry to leave the room. She figured, the less she saw of Leon, the better it would be for her to control her feelings.
Her blonde curls were still damp when she stepped out of the room and into the kitchen. She was surprised to find Leon sitting at the table, black rimmed glasses on his eyes and a pen suspended in the air.
“What are you doing?” She blurted out.
He had a thick stack of papers before him on the table, and a long register open where he was trying to either make notes, or calculate something.
He looked up at her, over the lenses of his spectacles. Suddenly, he looked much older, wiser and even more serious if he possibly could.
“Trying to do my accounts. I’ve never been too good at it.” He said.